COLUMNIST TURNS TO NIECE FOR HELP WITH NCAA TOURNAMENT MAKING PICKS ONE TOUGH BRACKET.

Byline: BRIAN DOHN College Basketball 

Let's make this fast because there is very little time. The NCAA Tournament tips off soon, and quicker than you can say ``$4.5 million settlement,'' the pools will close.

I would love to give out my picks, but really, nobody cares about them. I'd throw darts at a bracket, but I'd miss the bracket too many times and damage the walls.

So I tracked down everyone's office pool Joe, or in this case, office pool Josephine, to fill out the bracket. I am confident her picks will be better than mine, because she has no rhyme or reason as to why she picked most of the teams.

Yes, I turned to my niece, Nicole, who has loved basketball for at least the last 20 months, maybe longer. She was kind enough to blow off watching ``The Amazing Race'' long enough to giggle her way through 63 picks, and that's no small thing because this must have been one crazy-wicked ``Amazing Race.'' She said she blew off doing homework to watch the show.

So go grab a bracket, because we've taken most of the analytical data out of the equation by going to the source, a 17-year-old high school junior who is doing a paper on the history of basketball.

(She said it's gotta be five pages. ``Well, that's the minimum. Mine will be five pages,'' she giggled).

Nicole has first-hand knowledge of just how good at least nine teams can be because she's seen them in person. As a season-ticket holder to Rutgers games, she saw other teams look their best very often. Heck, she saw Penn State look like an NCAA team.

Now, on with her picks.

(And for those who win the pools, Nicole reminds everyone she just opened up an account to help pay for college).

Chicago

She has Illinois, the top-ranked team in the country, going to the Final Four because ``they're good.'' Her first-round winners in the Chicago region include Texas (``I don't know why''), Alabama, Boston (we think she means College, and not the Terriers), UAB, Arizona, Oklahoma State and St. Mary's, because ``they played good at Rutgers.''

Of course, Rutgers did get one of its nine victories against St. Mary's, so there is a soft place in her heart for the Gaels.

She also has Illinois beating Texas in the second round, again because ``they're good. I mean, I don't know. I guessed.'' She also took Boston (College?) over Alabama, Arizona to beat UAB ``because Arizona has a lower number'' and Oklahoma State to defeat St. Mary's. Even at 17, those special feelings only go so far.

Illinois beats Boston (College?) and Oklahoma State defeats Arizona. In the regional final, she took Illinois over Oklahoma State, again, because ``they're good.''

Albuquerque

Again, Nicole went out on a limb and took top seed Washington to reach the Final Four, and that made it very strenuous for her. It meant picking against two Big East teams, which is like someone from ESPN going against the ACC.

She took Pittsburgh to beat Pacific because the Panthers ``are in the Big East,'' and had Georgia Tech defeating George Washington ``because they went to the final game last year.'' She has Louisville over Louisiana-Lafayette, and Texas Tech over UCLA, which created quite a stir back East. ``I had UCLA down, but Grandma told me Texas Tech would win,'' so at least Nicole understands what scapegoat means.

She has Gonzaga beating Winthrop, West Virginia beating Creighton (a Big East thing) and Wake Forest topping Chattanooga.

In the next round, Nicole had Washington beating Pittsburgh (oh, the pain), Louisville beating Georgia Tech because the last-year-finalist thing is only good for a round, Texas Tech taking Gonzaga and Wake Forest beating West Virginia.

Washington beats Louisville, and she has Texas Tech defeating Wake Forest. ``I had to pick one underdog. They could have a good game, just like Rutgers and Notre Dame.''

But another miracle so soon?

Washington then beat Texas Tech. After all, how many miracles are there in March?

Syracuse

Nicole took North Carolina to beat Oakland, Mich., after someone told her a No. 1 seed never loses to a No. 16 seed, which is great because now I know she does listen to others.

She took Minnesota over Iowa State, but didn't know why, and has Villanova beating New Mexico, ``even though New Mexico has that kid I watched the other day, and he's good.'' Florida will knock off Ohio and Wisconsin (which beat Rutgers, she pointed out) will defeat Northern Iowa. She took Kansas over Bucknell, citing ``I watched a lot of their games'' as her reason, but with no mention of Wayne Simien.

She took Charlotte over North Carolina State, but then had an epiphany. ``Is that the Charlotte that Rutgers played?'' Yup, and Rutgers won. ``Can I change it?'' No. The round concludes with Connecticut beating Central Florida.

In the second round, it's North Carolina over Minnesota, Florida over Villanova (more pain), Kansas over Wisconsin and UConn over Charlotte. Then, North Carolina over Florida and UConn over Kansas.

As for the regional final, it's UConn because they have ``Charlie Villanueva, and he's really good. I was going to pick North Carolina because that had that May guy. Did you see that game where he had 24 rebounds and he had 20-something points, too?''

Austin

To make it quick, because tip-off is approaching and Nicole needs some kick-back tuition help - not to mention bed time is near and things aren't pretty when she gets tired - she likes Duke, Mississippi State, Michigan State, Syracuse (of course), Utah, Oklahoma, Iowa and Kentucky in the first round.

In the second round it's Duke, Syracuse, Utah and Kentucky, and the Wildcats will beat Utah in one regional semifinal while Syracuse beats Duke in the other. The 'Cuse than go to the Final Four ``because they have Hakim Warrick and Gerry McNamara and 'the hand.' I call (center Darryl) Watkins `the hand' because he had it wrapped up against Rutgers. The hand.''

Final Four

Nicole took UConn over Syracuse. She said it was payback for the Big East tournament. Illinois will beat Washington, but she didn't care why, since neither team was from the Big East.

As for her winner? Yup, UConn. ``They always win it. Well, usually.''

Well, at least twice.

So there you have it. Your pool-winning picks, straight from a 17-year- old who, unlike so many others, at least admits she has no idea about most of the games.

And even though the homework suffered and she didn't know two girls got kicked out of ``The Amazing Race,'' Nicole learned plenty - like Winthrop wasn't in Wisconsin or Wyoming, but rather North Carolina.

See, this was educational. It makes up for the missed homework and made detention worth it.

CAPTION(S):

2 photos, 6 boxes

Photo:

(1) UConn coach Jim Calhoun and his Huskies of the Big East have the upper hand because ``they always win it ... usually.''

Julie Jacobson/Associated Press

(2) - Oakland coach Greg Kampe

while laughing after his team, which was 12-18, beat Alabama A&M in Tuesday's NCAA play-in game.

Box:

(1) MEN'S NCAA TOURNAMENT SCHEDULE

(2) THEY SAID IT

(3) LINE SCORES

(4) No. 1 vs. THE FIELD

(5) RUMOR MILL

(6) NUMBERS GAME