CELEBRITY SELES; SURVIVOR SHOWS COURAGE, GRACE.

Byline: KAREN CROUSE

She is not THAT Monica. Her story hasn't pushed world news off the front pages of the daily papers. Unlike Monica Lewinsky, she can look at newsstands without feeling as though she's glancing in a mirror.

When Monica Seles lost in this year's French Open tennis final in a stirring triumph of the human spirit, she was relegated to the inside pages of a national sports weekly, which chose to run the second of three consecutive Michael Jordan covers instead.

No small irony, that, for Seles once ruled her sport as absolutely as the Chicago Bulls' Jordan has his. Then she was attacked by a knife-wielding stranger and her father was blindsided by cancer and for the better part of five years her world spun out of her control.

Seles' recovery has been remarkable, her hard-fought battles against fear and depression and sorrow awe-inspiring. There are people who are cast as victims of powerful men or whatever, and then there is Seles, who you'd genuinely feel sorry for if only she'd let you. But alas, her dignity and grace get in the way.

Seles, the sixth-ranked player in the world, will meet Ai Sugiyama today in the quarterfinals of the Toshiba Tennis Classic. From Carlsbad she will continue on to Manhattan Beach to defend her title in the Acura Classic, which she recently called her ``very favorite tournament'' on the WTA Tour.

The truth is, any city that's not her adopted hometown of Sarasota, Fla., qualifies as a haven these days. There's nowhere Seles can turn in Sarasota without being reminded of Karolj, her father and longtime coach who succumbed to stomach cancer after a two-year fight on May 14.

Seles had devoted more of the past year to caring for her father than fretting over her tennis. Games, sets and matches took a back seat to paying the family bills and administering protein drinks and morphine doses to her dad.

She dropped off the tour for 10 weeks to be by her father's side, forgoing the first of this year's Grand Slam events, the Australian Open, which she has won four times. If Chris Spielman, the Buffalo Bills linebacker who is taking the upcoming season off to help his wife in her battle against breast cancer, ever needs reassuring, he can always call Seles.

She has been there, done that.

Less than two weeks after Karolj's death, Seles, 24, played her opening match in the French Open. Jordan, the basketball star, needed more than a year away from his sport to recover from the murder of his father. But cancer is considerate that way; unlike a fatal gunshot wound, it at least affords the next of kin the chance to say a proper goodbye.

During Karolj's final months, he and his daughter left no sentiment unsaid. So when he passed, there was grief but no regrets.

``I don't think I'll ever be fully over it,'' Seles said of her father's death. ``I don't think that would be normal.''

What is normal, anyway? Convention holds that 16-year-olds don't win Grand Slam events, as Seles did at Roland Garros in 1990. Back then she acted like Gidget and mowed down opponents like Rambo. She'd unleash her two-fisted fury on some rival, then giggle her way through the postmatch press conference.

The extroverted Seles was milking the attentive press long before the Swiss Miss, Martina Hingis, arrived on the pro scene. Being the top dog among bloodhounds is never easy for a young pup - just ask the 17-year-old Hingis - but as she approached 20, Seles felt like her life had slipped into a comfortable groove.

Then her sense of security was stolen from her in a violent attack. In April of 1993, a male fan of Steffi Graf stabbed Seles, who had supplanted Graf at the top of the world rankings two years earlier, at a tournament in Graf's native Germany.

While Seles was in the hospital recovering from the wound in her back, her father fell ill with what turned out to be prostate cancer, starting his inexorable decline.

Over the next 27 months, Seles would be stabbed in the back repeatedly, in her nightmares and in real life by her fellow pros who voted almost unanimously not to protect Seles' No. 1 ranking until she was well enough to defend it and who generally offered her little in the way of support or encouragement.

One peer who went out of her way to wish Seles well during her convalescence was Arantxa Sanchez Vicario. So guess who stood at center court at Roland Garros after the French Open final in June and told the vanquished Seles, ``I'm so sorry I beat you.''

Sanchez Vicario showed a sense of drama in outlasting Seles 7-6, 0-6, 6-2 and a greater sense of decency in her postmatch comments.

While she was on the mend, one of Seles' sponsors sued her for staying off the tour. That's not why she chose to return to the sport three years ago.

Nor was Seles lured back to tennis for the money; with a net worth of $40 million, her financial future is secure. She came back because the sport is like an old friend. After watching her best friend die, she sure needed one.

She called the support she has received since her father's death ``amazing.'' If there are people reaching out to her now who before kept their hands folded at their chests, there's a reason.

The girl who won with preternatural ease was envied for being inordinately blessed. The woman who fought off adversity in three grueling sets is respected for being brave beyond belief.

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Photo: (Color) no caption (Monica Seles)

Dave Caulkin/Associated Press