Bush's special powers.

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While we were all distracted by Scooter and the Shooter, big time conservatives continued their campaign to sweep Bush's whole warrantless wiretapping thing under a rug of unnecessary complications.

First they claimed it was simply a matter of the President's prerogative: "He wants to bug somebody. He bugs them. That's what a commander in chief does."

Then they tried to apply a couple coats of legal paint. "Congress legalized the program when it authorized his use of force against terrorism."

Then they hammered it down with the big gun. The golden oldie. Their game-saving Hail Mary. National security: "If you disagree with in on Al Qaeda, you're endangering the troops and giving the terrorists a back rub."

People, this isn't complicated. It's very simple.

He broke the law.

Peed on the Constitution.

Flipped off the Founding Fathers.

Nobody knows why. All he needed to do was notify the FISA court within three days of when he began the eavesdropping. In previous trips to the court, 18,000 wiretaps were okayed and five turned down. Eighteen thousand out of eighteen thousand and five. Not a bad return. We're talking a .999 batting average here. As an old baseball man, Bush should know they keep you in the bigs with that.

So why didn't he go to the court? Maybe he worried they wouldn't buy these specific warrants. Maybe he got tired of the paperwork. Maybe he stretched the definition of terrorist to include Michael Moore's dog walker. Maybe he suspects NBC's David Gregory has a mole in the Justice Department. Or maybe he just really believes that warrants are for sissies and he is above the law.

His claim that during wartime he possesses special powers really gets me. Special powers? He can't even ride a bicycle without falling off. How come reason isn't one of his special powers? If he's got special powers, what's his Kryptonite: logic?

I don't want a President with special powers, I want a President who upholds the laws he swore to protect. I want a President who realizes he's a civil servant, not a monarch. I never knew King George the Third. I only read about King George the Third. King George was not a friend of mine, but you, sir, are no King George the Third.

And stop with the silly charge that the person who told the press about the program is the real bad guy for bringing the existence of the NSA spying to the attention of Al Qaeda. Any terrorist who doesn't know that talking on an open unencrypted line is probably not a good idea will not rise high in the ranks. He's not likely to be entrusted by Osama to do anything more important than run out to get the scorched coffee.

Danish editorial cartoons intimating that Islam is a violent religion sparked worldwide protests during which buildings were set on fire and people were killed. Perhaps a series of indignant letters to the editor might have better served the cause. Meanwhile, major Islamic clerics are calling for a boycott of all products made in Denmark. Which is expected to put a serious crimp in the traditional afternoon Muslim sardine break.

Political comic Will Durst thinks Bush is making less sense than a polar bear sipping a sloe gin fizz on a lawn chair.