Blood is thicker than holy water: Jerry Falwell once denied knowing Brett Beasley. But before his death, the preacher decided to show "Christian love" to his gay HIV-positive relative.

The last time Brett Beasley saw J Jerry Falwell alive was this past April at their uncle's funeral in Virginia. Falwell officiated at the ceremony, and afterward the first cousins once removed briefly spoke. Beasley told Falwell he looked tired; Falwell replied that there's no rest for the weary--God's work is never done.

Beasley, 46, came out in The Advocate in 1999, the same year he learned he was HIV-positive. At the time the founder of the Moral Majority denied knowing his mother's grandnephew, although Beasley insisted he did. When Beasley pressed him on the matter a year later, ahead of the younger man's appearance on the cover of Poz, the reverend explained "that God had told him, Jerry, it wouldn't be right for there to be a media circus made of this situation. No good can come of it." Beasley says, "I told him that God had talked to me too and had said he wouldn't be happy if I kept my mouth shut. I told him, 'You don't have a direct line to God.'"

Beasley went on with his life in Raleigh, N.C., where he worked in technology sales. But in November 2006, after his left leg was amputated as a result of a mountain-biking accident, he moved in with his parents in Lynchburg, Va. Now in the same town as Falwell, Beasley decided to call his relative, who, he says, welcomed the opportunity to reconnect and invited him to meet at his office at Liberty University.

There, Falwell asked Beasley what was on his mind. "I told him, 'I want you to come out in support of me and HIV-positive people,'" Beasley says. "He sat behind his desk, put his hand up to his chin, and said that perhaps it was time to do just that." Falwell asked him not to say anything "until after we had agreed about what he would say."

That discussion never happened--Falwell died May 15--leaving Beasley to wonder what might have been if such a conservative voice had shown "Christian love" to a gay man living with HIV. "My feelings for Jerry are mixed," he says. "He said a lot of hateful and hurtful things, but blood is thicker than water. You can't pick your relatives."