Billy, we hardly knew ye.I CAN'T SHAKE THE FEELING that Shatner's let the team down. That's the team, as in humankind, and Shatner--well, you know who he is. Not too long ago, around the time Star Trek was marking its 40th anniversary, William Shatner decided not to tag along on Virgin Galactic's first space foray, slated for 2008. His reasons had something to do with fiery crashes, vomiting in space, and wanting a guarantee that he'd come back. To which I say, take a motion-sickness pill, wear fire-resistant drawers, and accept the fact that--as we all know--there are no guarantees in life. Shatner's refusal means that Captain Kirk (for he'll hardly go down in history as T.J. Hooker) won't even meekly go where others have gone before. Not that this is the first time we've seen chinks in the great one's armor. In the early nineties the guy who never had any trouble recording his captain's log told TV Guide he couldn't figure out his VCR VCR: see videocassette recorder. VCR in full videocassette recorder Electromechanical device that records, stores on a videotape cassette, and plays back on a TV set recorded images and sound. . Recently he confessed to Wired magazine that he didn't "know how a computer works." Come on, you say. He's Shatner, for criminy's sake. He's not really Captain Kirk and he doesn't have the right stuff and we shouldn't expect him to. He's an actor (who may suffer under the delusion that he's also a singer, but the less said about that the better) and he doesn't owe any debts to humankind. Or does he? For all Shatner's carping carp·ing adj. Naggingly critical or complaining. carp ing·ly adv.Noun 1. about overzealous fans and the television series that wouldn't die, Star Trek has actually been very good to him. Not to belabor be·la·bor tr.v. be·la·bored, be·la·bor·ing, be·la·bors 1. To attack with blows; hit, beat, or whip. See Synonyms at beat. 2. To assail verbally. 3. the Hooker thing, but how many blockbuster movies were based on that series? How many scores of Star Trek-related and assorted science fiction books has Shatner penned, or at least lent his name to? How about those Priceline commercials? Do you think he got them based on the renown he garnered from Kingdom of the Spiders, back in 1977? If for no other reason than the fact he's inflicted upon us both his singing and, in his latest reincarnation as a game show host, Show Me the Money, Shatner owes it to humankind to grab a barf bag barf bag n. A disposable plastic or paper bag provided to a passenger by an airline for use in case of airsickness. and suit up. And it has to be Shatner, when you get down to it. For the idea of manned space exploration hasn't been knocking anyone's socks off lately and the news that Madonna--perhaps weary of living in a material world--is heading spaceward space·ward adv. & adj. Toward, to, or in outer space. Adv. 1. spaceward - towards outer space spacewards on a Russian ship in 2009 may not be enough to change that. Some might argue that we should keep our feet firmly fixed on the ground, heads down, noses to the grindstone grindstone or grind common metaphor for industriousness. [Pop. Culture: Misc.] See : Industriousness and forget about space exploration. Others will say our thoughts should be focused on more heavenly matters, even at the expense of exploring the heavens and advancing scientific progress. Of course once upon a time there were those who counseled against exploration for fear that we might be hurtled over the edge of the flat earth. If you agree that we need more manned space missions, you'll probably also agree that we need a figurehead figurehead, carved decoration usually representing a head or figure placed under the bowsprit of a ship. The art is of extreme antiquity. Ancient galleys and triremes carried rostrums, or beaks, on the bow to ram enemy vessels. , someone who can get people looking skyward sky·ward adv. & adj. At or toward the sky. sky wards adv. again. Sadly enough, the way the world works these days that person will probably be a celebrity. After all, people notice when Bono tackles poverty in Africa African nations typically fall toward the bottom of any list measuring economic activity, such as per capita income or per capita GDP, despite a wealth of natural resources. The bottom 25 spots of the United Nations (UN) quality of life index are regularly filled by African nations. , or when George Clooney condemns Sudanese genocide or when Brad Pitt takes on rebuilding the Gulf Coast. So why shouldn't Shatner be the logical choice to rekindle our interest in manned space exploration? When it comes down to it, who else could possibly fill the role? Leonard Nimoy? Spock wasn't really the leader type. Patrick Stewart? I don't think so. Stephen Hawking? Too brainy brain·y adj. brain·i·er, brain·i·est Informal Intelligent; smart. brain i·ly adv. . Mark Hammill? Oh, for crying out loud. The only other person who might pull it off would be the guy who first boldly went--to the moon, that is. But alas, it seems that Nell Armstrong was content to splash down and blend into the woodwork. Should we even be concerned if few people seem to give a damn Verb 1. give a damn - show no concern or interest; always used in the negative; "I don't give a hoot"; "She doesn't give a damn about her job" care a hang, give a hang, give a hoot about manned space exploration anymore, and aren't unmanned missions more practical and economical than manned ones anyway? Yes and yes. But a manned mission to Mars--the logical terminus for our next giant leap--isn't necessarily about making sense. If you don't understand why, stop and think about some of the most amazing words ever spoken: "The Eagle has landed." For it was on the day they were spoken (just weeks after Star Trek's demise, trivia fans) that it seemed like human beings had managed to get something right for a change, even if it was orchestrated by superpowers huffing and blustering blus·ter v. blus·tered, blus·ter·ing, blus·ters v.intr. 1. To blow in loud, violent gusts, as the wind during a storm. 2. a. To speak in a loudly arrogant or bullying manner. as they raced to gather up firsts. So to Shatner, I say buck up and take this trip for the team. Maybe the whole adventure will be nothing more than a silly joyride into space. But maybe it'll be something more, a spark to reignite Verb 1. reignite - ignite anew, as of something burning; "The strong winds reignited the cooling embers" ignite, light - cause to start burning; subject to fire or great heat; "Great heat can ignite almost any dry matter"; "Light a cigarette" our exuberance for the final frontier. And Bill, if you do change your mind, whatever you do--don't wear a red shirt. William I. Lengeman III is a freelance journalist, book reviewer, and publisher of Tea Guy Speaks (http://www.teaguyspeaks.com) and Weird Eats (http://www.weirdeats.com). |
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