Best friend moved in on my husband; Just Joan CATCH UP ON JUST JOAN ONLINE www.dailyrecord.co.uk/joanbornie.

Byline: joan burnie 

Q I WAS married for 10 years. It was not a happy marriage, but I was brought up to believe divorce was the last resort.

So I stuck it out until I couldn't take it any more. My husband was not physically abusive, but he did everything to bring me down. According to him I was a useless wife and mother and hopeless in bed.

One of the things that kept me sane was one of my neighbours, who became my best friend. When things got really bad I could always go round to hers for a coffee or a drink.

I told this woman things about my marriage that I couldn't tell my own mum, including the fact that my husband regularly raped me. She was the one encouraging me to leave him.

My daughter and I are now back living with my mum and I am in the process of getting a divorce. My husband has not paid a penny in maintenance and has no interest in seeing our daughter.

But in some ways I'm glad. If I never saw him again it would be too soon. I wasn't surprised either when I was told he was seeing someone else.

But imagine how I felt when I discovered that the "someone" was the woman I thought was my best friend.

She was still emailing and texting me at my mum's, but never mentioned she was with my husband. I feel really betrayed and, in fact, what she has done upsets me more than anything my husband did to me.

My mum says they're welcome to each other and to forget they ever existed. But how can I?

A YOUR mother is right.The woman's a fool and no doubt, if she sticks with your soon to be ex-husband, she'll not have her sorrows to seek.

Nor can she possibly say she wasn't well warned about what he was like. But that doesn't make it any easier for you to stomach what she's done.You told her all these private things about your marriage and she's thrown them back in your face.

No wonder you feel completely let down.

She's also a coward who didn't even have the guts to tell you she was moving in on your husband, but continued to pretend she was your friend.

But whether it was all an act or not, no longer matters.

What counts is that you've finally managed to escape from an emotionally abusive relationship.

Now you carry on with the divorce, but make sure you get everything to which you're entitled financially.

Then you leave your ex to ruin someone else's life - as he will.