BRUMMIES Doddy needs YOU; BIRMINGHAM COMEDY Festival 7 To attend Comedy Festival.

Byline: By Graham Young

KEN Dodd is a man on a mission - to keep the nation laughing.

In the autumn of a year which has consistently delivered the worst economic news for a generation, Doddy is still on the road hoping to lighten everyone's load.

Currently averaging around ten shows per month, he comes up with about six new gags per day and tries to work out how to tailor them into his act.

"Everyone should carry a notebook or write a diary," he says.

"It's fascinating how we all change over the years.

I've become more of a sage, or philosopher.

"Today I think: 'Never put off 'til tomorrow what you can do today because you might like it and want to do it again tomorrow'."

Famous for carrying on beyond midnight, Doddy is back into his groove after his longest career break.

An operation for a strangulated hernia in Liverpool's Royal hospital kept him off stage for a month at the turn of the year.

But, after 54 years of telling gags since he first started in 1954, it was as if he'd never been away when he met the spotlight again.

Not for Ken the first night nerves of a love struck teenager. Just the realisation that he was armed with even more material.

"Having an operation is like going to a florists," he reasons. "You wake up and then you can just sniff all of these flowers in front of you."

When he plays Birmingham's Alexandra Theatre from October 1-3, his final night will coincide with the opening of the Seventh Birmingham Comedy Festival when many a young gun eager to follow in his footsteps will be plying their trade.

Few will have any ideas about how harsh economic realities can be.

"I don't think things are as bad as they could be at the moment," says Ken. "Who knows?

Nobody can predict the future, but we all certainly need to laugh and the whole of Britain needs a good laugh."

He claims not to worry about money - and chuckles when I suggest that's because he knows he could go out tomorrow and just do another gig.

"I've got money I've never even used," he says. "They tell you to save up for a rainy day and then when you go on holiday you get 14 all at once."

This year, he took ten days holiday in Egypt, on the Sinai peninsula, where it's only rained once in seven years.

Aren't people who've tried to escape Britain shocked to find Ken Dodd somewhere like that?

"I think 99 per cent of people are very, very well mannered," he says. "They might acknowledge you, but will always say they don't want to intrude. It always amazes me how kind and considerate people are.

"We're still a great nation, aren't we? Well, everyone else wants to come here - especially to Birmingham."

A city that was, of course, the loser in the hard-fought battle with Liverpool to become this year's European Capital of Culture.

"That's going great up on Merseyside," he says. "We're running classes in graffiti and the dockers are learning ballet."

Politicians over the age of 40 who don't wear ties annoy him the most.

"It's like they are trying to be 21 again," he says. "I've got hundreds of ties and even wear one going to bed. They're the last stranglehold of men's fashion sense.

"I don't understand men with one earring.

Pain and jewellery don't go.

"Ties and training shoes don't go either - you have to walk around with your shirt hanging out."

Doddy reckons seven threads cover every known joke, beginning with Adam & Eve and the eternal battle of the sexes.

And, having honed his act against other variety stars, he's all in favour of the benefits of competition to fine tune them - even if schools have shied away from such challenges in recent years.

"Every aspect of life is a series of contests, from your professional life to your social life and health," he says. "You have got to have something that makes you 'go'.

"My 'brothers' were people like Bob Monkhouse, Les Dawson and Tommy Cooper, and, when I was a judge on New Faces, I could see that Joe Pasquale was going to be another big star because he was very funny and creative.

"When one of my fellow panelists (Nina Myskow) criticised him, I asked: 'Have you ever been on stage and tried to make people laugh... you don't know anything about comedy, this lad will be a big star'."

But where Doddy draws the line is with The X Factor.

"We used to put people in the stocks, now we put them on talent shows and it's wrong... they're a theatre of embarrassment.

"Talent shows are one of the oldest forms of show business but if you are going to put people on you need to nurture them and give them the right encouragement. Insults are no fun at all.

"It's like roses, you put them in a nice place, talk to them and feed them and you get nice roses.

"Anyone can acquire songs and new material, but your guiding light has to be your enthusiasm.

"People who want to enter this business have to ask themselves if they can go without food and drink for six months. Live in digs."

The son of a coal merchant, Doddy appreciates the rising cost of fuel more than most.

"Have you ever been to bed in your overcoat?" he enquires.

"People won't be having dinner parties in the future. They'll be having warming parties and saying: 'We're putting the heating on next Friday, do you want to come round?

"At the Alex, we'll be encouraging people to sit close to each other."

One thing's for sure, Doddy will be the hottest man in the theatre, even though he'll be 81 on November 8.

"I can't imagine doing anything else now," he says. "Someone could provide me with plenty of decorating or gardening jobs, but I'm an entertainer.

"And I'm still stage struck."

"Liverpool's the Capital Of Culture so we're running classes in graffiti and the dockers are learning ballet

"People won't be having dinner parties in the future. They'll be having warming parties and saying: 'We're putting the heating on next Friday, do you want to come round?'

"They tell you to save up for a rainy day and then when you go on holiday you get 14 all at once

CAPTION(S):

RIB TICKLER... Ken Dodd is still playing marathon shows at the age of 80.