BIRDS OF A FEATHER FLOCK TOGETHER.

How ya gonna keep 'em down on the farm after they've seen Pareeeeeee?

That's for sure what we thought after we saw Richard Newton's ``Mae West-ern Turkey,'' the winning entry in this year's Dress-the-Naked-Turkey Contest.

Woo-woo, ya know - with all those feathers and sequins and false eyelashes and stuff, this lovely creature would make any turkey fly with the eagles. (And please don't forget the matching handbag and diamond ring. Accessories are soooooooo important!)

Newton, 52, who owns a hair salon in Burbank, said he first just planned to color it, but decided ``that won't make it.'' He started working with glitter glue, then figured she needed a dress ... and it just snowballed from there.

The hair was the crowning glory, though. After all, ``I cut hair. How could I send her out without great hair?''

Overall, Newton worked on his Mae West turkey for two weeks before he sent her to come and see us sometime!

Newton will enjoy a frozen turkey for his Thanksgiving table, courtesy of the us turkeys at the Daily News. But he was clear about his motives:

``Winning wasn't the thing. Doing it was more fun than winning,'' he said.

Yeah, but we think winning is real nice, too, ya know?

Because we like winners - and because the turkey competition was so stiff - we just had to pick another one from among the hundreds of kids who sent in turkeys, too. Dorothy Copeland, a third-grader at White Oak Elementary School in Westlake Village, will receive a chocolate turkey for her Italian chef, which knocked us off our little turkey feet.

Her mother tells us that Dorothy spent an entire morning of her vacation working on her bird, which was one of 18 of the wildest, most creative turkeys submitted by teacher Trudy Shapiro.

Shapiro sent her students home with a copy of our bird and said: ``Do your stuff(ing).'' Our hat is off to Ms. Shapiro, who gets our vote for turkey teacher of the year for inspiring such amazing creations and gobbling up the competition.

And what a competition it was.

We were nearly overrun with feathers and glitter and macaroni and buttons and felt and construction paper and dried fruit (!) and just plain crayon and markers as more than 700 turkeys (708, at last count!) flew into the Daily News newsroom from all over Los Angeles.

Elementary-school teachers everywhere rejoiced as we provided them with an insta-art project for the week. Sometimes the teacher submitted one, too (thank you, Mrs. Laufer from Pinecrest School in Van Nuys).

Even senior centers and nursery school programs flooded our offices with birds of a feather flocking together.

One family had such a good time turning out turkeys that they had to photocopy the naked bird because they couldn't get enough copies in the paper itself. (Um, for a quarter ...)

And a lot of you just plain ol' had time on your hands. (Hey, get a life, guys!)

There were some distinct themes this year, including some Turkeys in Black and a slew of spice girls (no, not THE Spice Girls, but turkeys that were clothed in parsley, sage, rosemary and thyme, not to mention nutmeg and other aromatic stuff).

Glitter and sequins were in; sports themes got plenty of action; and political figures got their just deserts.

Whatever rows your boats ... we're just glad we were there to provide a good time for everyone. And we're darn sure that there's no excuse for a turkey to go undressed for the holiday.

CAPTION(S):

33 Photos

Photo: (1--4--Cover--Color) ON THE COVER: Our cover birds represent L.A. at its best: Maggie Kendall of Burbank dressed her turkey in Dodger blue, but he still missed the playoffs; Krista Stroud of Canoga Park offers ''Baywatch (Bird-Saver) Babe``; and Priscilla Gomez, 8, of North Hills introduced us to her ''Mexican-American Turkey``; and Marianne Basford of Silver Lake gives us ''Thomasina Monroe.``

(5--Color) Richard Newton's winning turkey - ''Mae West-ern`` - was accessorized JUST so, with matching handbag and feather hat. For him, winning wasn't the thing: Creating the turkey ''was more fun than winning.

(6--Color)''What a dream, what a dream!`` bubbled Barbara Copeland after being told that daughter Dorothy, 8, won the children's competition with her Italian chef.

(7--Color) ''Come up and baste me sometime,`` says Chatsworth resident Dolly Perillo's turkey version of Mae West.

(8--Color) If a little glitz is good, a lot is better for this turkey cheerleading captain created by Tiffany Anzalone, 11, of Sylmar

(9--Color) ''Thanksgiving Fashion Plate`` - we couldn't agree more with Nora G. Hecker's description of her feather-and-sequin creation. The Sherman Oaks resident even added her specialty label.

(10--Color) Katie Hessick, 9, of Westlake Village dressed her turkey in baby jammies. How pretty in pink!

(11--Color) Linda Brengle of Winnetka used gold leaf, lace and other sparkles for this beauteous creature.

(12--Color) What turkey wouldn't be thrilled to dress in glitter and gold lame? Daniel C. Wolf of Lancaster provided just the ticket.

(13--Color) ''Super Turkey,' created by Krista Stroud of Canoga Park, comes equipped with his own star power.

(14--Color) `We've heard of Disco Duck, but ''Disco Turkey``? Laurel Schwartz of West Hills apparently is well- acquainted with him. Move over, John Travolta.

(15--Color) Good enough to eat, says Anna M. Siebert of West Hills. Yes, it's completely made of dried fruit. Tasty, tasty.

(16--Color) Maria Saetta of West Hills created a turkey that keeps going and going and going and ...

(17--Color) We thought this was pretty blatant pandering - and we loved it. This Daily News turkey was the work of Dalia Charbel, 17, of Sherman Oaks.

(18--19) These two entries - sent in separately and unrelatedly by two artistes - best demonstrated the Thanksgiving holiday itself, so how could we not present them here? Susan Haack of La Crescenta dressed her turkey in Pilgrim garb, while Marie F. Gallegos of Van Nuys gets a feather in her cap for her Indian friend.

(20) Stephan Goodman, 9, of Westlake Village had avision of neoprene, which was cut out to create this ''Diving Turkey.``

(21) Jordan Pang, 10, of Canoga Park espoused a message that any turkey would respond to this time of year!

(22) ''Shaquille O`Turkey`` slam-dunked into our office from Shoshannah Langlois, 10, of Rosemead.

(23) Spice is nice, and this ''Spice Turkey`` by Carole Singer of Tarzana was music to our ears. It certainly was less aromatic than the onslaught of birds that were decorated in REAL spices and herbs. Is this a theme or something?

(24) We were hearing strains of ''Pomp and Circumstance`` when this turkey arrived, compliments of Chad Price, 11, of Granada Hills.

(25--27) A family affair

The Hardie family of Newbury Park turned our turkey contest into a togetherness moment. After all, don't they say that the family that draws together stays together? Anyway, from left we have the works of Daniel, 10; Eddie, 11; and mom Jeanne, whose swift-footed turkey gives new meaning to the term ''fast food.``

(28) Surf's up for Ryan Gallagher,14, of Valencia, whose ''Totally Tubular Turkey`` caught a perfect wave at the Southern California shore.

(29) ''Mr. McGobble`` was the product of teamwork, submitted by the Tice girls: Rachael, 12, and Rebecca, 14, of Moorpark.

(30) The feathers must have been flying at William Carroll's house when the 9-year-old from Westlake Village dressed his bird.

(31) Aaron Clarke, 10, of Granada Hills even provided transportation for his ''Born to Be Wild`` turkey.

(32) Patricia Chiffer led the pack for a whole flock of ''Turkeys in Black.`` We were partial to the Eagle Rock resident's stylish shades.

(33) Blossom Alegar of Palmdale glitzed up her turkey with sequins. You'll have to use your imagination to figure out how colorful this turkey really is.