BE CAREFUL OF YOUR LICENSE-FRAME ADS.Byline: JAMES DAWSON
James Dawson (whose pseudonyms include Daltrey St. James, Angelina Troy and T.J. Madison) is a writer whose work has appeared in places ranging from The Los Angeles Times Local View MAYBE I really was doing 51 in a 35 mph zone on Ventura Boulevard, but I doubt it. I think my license-plate frame was at least partially responsible for the $191 ticket. Fellow pathetically desperate entertainment-industry wannabes Wannabes is an online interactive soap and game created for the BBC by Illumna Digital. Wannabes follows on from Jamie Kane, the BBC's previous foray into online interactive drama. The show/game consists of 14 10 minute episodes released twice a week. in Southern California -- and isn't that almost everyone? -- can learn a money-saving lesson from my misfortune I had the frame made by a swap-meet vendor. Across the top was ``SCREENPLAY.'' At the bottom was ``WWW WWW or W3: see World Wide Web. (World Wide Web) The common host name for a Web server. The "www-dot" prefix on Web addresses is widely used to provide a recognizable way of identifying a Web site. .REBELHELL.COM (1) (Computer Output Microfilm) Creating microfilm or microfiche from the computer. A COM machine receives print-image output from the computer either online or via tape or disk and creates a film image of each page. ,'' the address of a bare-bones Web site I created for one of my tragically unsold scripts. In a town where success often has more to do with marketing than merit, I figured that such a blatantly direct tactic had two chances of paying off: If some old-school studio executive with development money to burn spotted the frame on the freeway, he might be so impressed by its shamelessness that he would check out my Web site. ``You weren't embarrassed to lay it on the line and sell yourself like dry goods, kid,'' he would tell me later. ``I like your attitude.'' Or a young-gun hipster with an eye for indie acquisitions might be amused by the frame's tongue-in-cheek, postmodern irony. ``Most people would miss the joke that you were making fun of being so obvious,'' he would grin. I would love to report that my unsubtle attempt at self-promotion resulted in a Hollywood ending with a contract that included points of the gross. Unfortunately, all I got was a San Fernando Valley San Fernando Valley Valley, southern California, U.S. Northwest of central Los Angeles, the valley is bounded by the San Gabriel, Santa Susana, and Santa Monica mountains and the Simi Hills. ending, with a large ticket and points on my record. Maybe the motorcycle cop would have pulled me over anyway. Maybe he didn't think I was an arrogant, overpaid o·ver·pay v. o·ver·paid , o·ver·pay·ing, o·ver·pays v.tr. 1. To pay (a party) too much. 2. To pay an amount in excess of (a sum due). v.intr. To pay too much. egomaniac e·go·ma·ni·a n. Obsessive preoccupation with the self. e go·ma who was rubbing
people's faces in the fact that I got paid for making stuff up.
Maybe he didn't have a screenplay of his own at home that he
couldn't sell after a decade of trying.
Still, if I was a guy whose career consisted of lying in wait for speed- trap scofflaws, I have to admit that I would enjoy ticketing some motorists more than others. . A tattooed gangbanger gang·bang·er n. 1. Slang A member of a violent street gang. 2. Vulgar Slang One who takes part in a gangbang. , a condescending businessman or anybody resembling someone I disliked could tell it to the judge. And some creative-writing clown who hoped to get rich off something with the vulgar, peace-disturbing title ``Rebel Hell''? Well, let's just put that boy in the high-dollar, ``more than 15 over the speed limit'' category by writing him up for doing 51 instead of 50. Just to twist the knife a little. I could have tried my luck in court, hoping the judge would take my 15-year ticket-free record into account. But I didn't feel lucky. I took off the license-plate frame, though. If I ever get another ticket, I want to be sure it's not because somebody thinks my life is too wonderful for words. |
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