BADGE 193; NEWS LAPD OFFICER TO WEAR HIS SLAIN FATHER'S NUMBER.

Byline: Dennis McCarthy 

It will be an emotional moment this morning when she stands in front of her son, Bryce Verna, to pin Badge No. 193 on his police uniform, Sandra Jackson says.

How can it be otherwise?

This man of 25 graduating from the Los Angeles Police Academy in two weeks was just a boy of 9 the last time his mom held Badge No. 193 in her hands.

It was presented to her in a shadowbox at the funeral of her slain husband, LAPD Officer Paul Verna, in 1983.

Bryce was sitting next to her that gray day in his Little League uniform, holding his dad's police motorcycle helmet. His younger brother, Ryan, 4, was sitting on the lap of one of his dad's closest police officer buddies.

Out of honor and respect for her husband, a Medal of Valor winner, the Los Angeles Police Department retired Officer Paul Verna's badge number from service.

Now, it's back. On the chest of his son, Bryce.

When he was a little boy, he'd lie awake at night in his room over the garage, waiting to hear his dad's police motorcycle coming up the street, Bryce said.

Only then would he close his eyes and let sleep come. His dad was home from work safe. Everything was all right.

``I always knew, even as a little boy, that one day I wanted to be like him, a policeman,'' Bryce said Wednesday, preparing for today's badge pinning ceremony at the LAPD training academy.

There was never any doubt, Bryce said, even after his world was shattered when his 35-year-old father was shot to death after making what appeared to be a routine traffic stop in Lake View Terrace on June 2, 1983.

``I guess some people thought I'd outgrow it, the desire to be a policeman like my dad, but I never did,'' he said. ``It was always there.

``After dad was killed, the people in the department looked after my mom, Ryan and me. They helped us. I've never forgotten that.

``Now, it's my turn to help people,'' Bryce said. ``I know my dad would be proud.''

These are times of great emotional swings in the Jackson and Verna families' lives. Bryce becoming a police officer has brought great pride, but a judge's decision last December to grant Paul Verna's convicted killer, Kenneth Earl Gay, another day in court has brought anger.

A judge ruled that Gay - living on San Quentin's Death Row the last 14 years - has one last chance to save his own life because his attorney failed to represent him adequately during the original sentencing hearing in 1985.

So next month, while rookie Officer Bryce Verna takes to the streets to protect and serve the people of this city, Kenneth Gay, his father's killer 16 years ago, will be back in court, trying to save his own life.

When the training officer at the Police Academy told his class that each of them could choose the person they wanted to pin the badge on them during this ceremony today, Bryce Verna smiled.

There was only one person for that job, he knew. The woman who had taken two scared, little boys by the hand after their father's funeral and told them everything would be fine.

The woman who had shaped and formed them to be good men. Just like their father.

When Bryce got home from the academy that night, he called his mother to invite her and his stepfather, retired LAPD Detective Norm Jackson, to the badge pinning ceremony.

``I can choose whoever I want to pin it on,'' he told his mother.

``Good,'' Sandra Jackson said. ``Who did you choose, your training officer or one of your good friends?''

``No,'' Bryce said. ``I want you to do it.''

The son following in his father's footsteps couldn't see it over the phone, but his mother was biting down hard on her lip, trying not to cry.

``This means so much to our family, and I know Paul would be overwhelmed and so proud of his son right now,'' she would say later.

The badge that Paul Verna wore for this city had ``policeman'' etched on it. They don't do that anymore, not since women were given the opportunity to protect and serve this city, too.

Today, it is ``police officer'' etched on the badge, so a new Badge 193 will be issued to Bryce Verna, paid for by the L.A. Police Memorial Foundation.

The rookie officer said Wednesday he will wear it proudly, but for how long, he isn't sure.

Another Verna, his younger brother, Ryan, 21, is going through the pre-academy testing right now to join him on the Police Department soon.

``When he makes it, I'll pass the badge on to him,'' Bryce said.

``Dad would have wanted that.''

CAPTION(S):

3 photos

Photo: (1) Officer Paul Verna, Badge 193, was 35 when he was killed in the line of duty in 1983.

File photo

(2) Bryce Verna, 9, center, sits with his mother, Sandra, and his brother, Ryan, at his father's funeral.

File photo

(3 -- color) Bryce Verna holds the LAPD badge of his slain father, Paul Verna, as his mother, Sandy Jackson, and brother, Ryan, look on.

Michael Owen Baker/Staff Photographer