Attack of the acronyms. (Packets).

When instant-message mania started sweeping screens nationwide, we knew it would come to this. The need for speed has prompted IM geeks to create acronyms for nearly every sentiment. If you thought the infinite variations on the ubiquitous sideways smiley faces were getting a bit difficult to decipher, you may be feeling lost in a seemingly meaningless sea of vowels and consonants. Luckily, there are Web sites for laggards like you, and buzzwhack.com is one of them. But just to give you a primer in the acronymania sweeping keyboards nationwide, here are a few of the latest and greatest.

AOS: All Options Stink. A military fave now bandied about in the business sector, as in "We've been brainstorming for three hours and we're still AOS."

BSOD: Blue Screen of Death. What happens when Windows responds to a user command with a bright blue screen and instructions on what to do, which often involves an emergency restart.

BTA: Before The Attacks. Refers to the time before September 11 and its impact on attitudes, as in "That's so BTA," or so naive and self-centered.

BYOA: Bring Your Own Advil. Suggests an unpleasant, headache-inducing task ahead, as in "We're having a budget meeting -- BYOA."

CLM: Career Limiting Move. Act that hinders future prospects, as in "Jack left his resume in the copier. It was a major CLM."

404: Derived from the "file not found" Web page error message, a 404 is a derogatory term for someone's brainpower, as in "My new boss is so 404."

LAQ: Lame-ass quote. Spawned by today's multimedia sound-bite world, LAQs are the PR department's worst nightmare.

SAV: Screw Around Vigorously, as in "Don't just stand there. DO SOMETHING!"

TMI: Too much input or too much information.

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