ARE YOU READY FOR 2007?

Byline: STEVE DILBECK

The NFL 2008 season has arrived, and that means time to offer our unique, incredible, unmatchable insight to the new season.

This is the same insight that last year forecast the Colts would be the biggest bomb of the season, but, hey, nobody gets them all right.

Just clip and save, because these things are locks for the coming season:

Peyton Manning will lead all NFL players in endorsements.

We like to get the hard ones out of the way early.

Madden NFL '08 be damned, Vince Young will again have a more impressive season than Matt Leinart.

Leinart, however, will still have that great DirectTV commercial with the Mannings.

Buffalo's Paul Posluszny will be the NFL rookie of the year.

I mean, check out that name. Right out of central casting. Better yet, he's a middle linebacker. And from Penn State.

All the Poz needs is a nice broken nose. And maybe a "k" somewhere in his name.

Tiki Barber will blame his Pop Warner Mighty Mite coach for his early retirement.

It's coming soon, when he has another book to sell.

Ben Roethlisberger will be exposed as an OK quarterback unable to carry a team.

The guy seemed to be a dream when he led the Super Bowl-caliber Steelers a week after first shaving, but now the running game has been diminished, his coach is gone and his quarterback rating is already plummeting (98.6 in his first three seasons to 75.4 last year).

He can always claim it's that impersonator.

Terrell Owens and Whoopi Goldberg will be seen holding hands while walking their pet poodles through a downtown Dallas park.

Donovan McNabb, apparently last seen in the 2005 Super Bowl, will again prove he is an upper-echelon quarterback for the Eagles.

It's either that, or deal with those kind-hearted Philadelphia fans again. Talk about motivation.

Daunte Culpepper, apparently last seen in 2004 (over 4,700 yards and 39 TDs), will resurrect his career with the last-stop Raiders.

He may not start the opener, but I'm sorry, you're really telling me Josh McCown is a better quarterback?

And forget about JaMarcus Russell, who has all the makings of a another monumental Raiders No. 1 bust (come on, how many had him on their radar until the Sugar Bowl; and LSU beat Notre Dame, which apparently is not so hard to do).

There will be less jail time for the Bengals, and not so coincidentally, more victories, as this crazy thing called defense actually makes an appearance in Cincinnati.

Tampa Bay's Cadillac Williams will look more like the tailback stifled by USC than the one who gobbled up yards as a rookie.

Jeff Garcia will provide steady leadership at quarterback for the Buccaneers this season, so there's no more built-in excuse about teams stacking the line against Williams.

He gained a whopping 798 yards last season.

Best game of the regular season: Pats at Colts, Nov. 4.

The Chargers under Norv Turner will look just like the Chargers under Marty Schottenheimer.

Until the playoffs, where they actually win a game.

Best defensive player in the league will be Pittsburgh's Troy Polamalu.

Yeah, he's a safety, but he has as much impact on a game as any defensive player around. He makes things happen. Seems to be in on every tackle. And who doesn't love that hair?

Brady Quinn will become Cleveland's starting quarterback by midseason.

In true Browns' fashion, however, their playoff hopes will already be over.

The NFL will be stunned to discover in mid-November it has a team in Jacksonville.

Unable to determine why, it will announce the team is moving to Los Angeles in December.

The Falcons will actually be a better team without Michael Vick.

The Texans still won't have a good answer why they selected Mario Williams over Reggie Bush or Young with the No.1 pick.

Mario is a name that will haunt the franchise forever. Think Tony Mandarich.

Dallas quarterback Tony Romo will not fumble a single snap all season.

Alas, none will be as important as his bobble against Seattle in last season's playoffs.

The New York media, showing uncharacteristic restraint, will wait until the second game before calling for the head of quarterback Eli Manning.

The New York Post, however, is left embarrassed when it cannot think of another "Three Dog Night"-inspired headline.

It will be Joe Gibbs' final season as the Redskins' coach, again.

Sorry to say, but the game seems to have passed him by. In his three years since returning to Washington, the Redskins are three games under .500. That would be a record year for Congress, but this is a privately-financed operation.

Maybe he could try NASCAR. Some people think it's actually a sport.

Broncos running back Travis Henry will hit double figures.

It must be hard for the Virility King to sit on nine. That would be nine children, by nine different wives.

Wide receiver Calvin Johnson will live up to the hype in Detroit, proving that old adage true, even a blind squirrel can find a nut once in awhile.

Matt "Big Daddy" Leinart will improve upon his strong start from last season, but just as it appears the Cardinals have a shot at making the playoffs, they will stumble, suddenly remembering they are the Cardinals.

The Raiders will again be the worst team in the NFL, giving all of those levelheaded fans in Los Angeles reason to be thankful.

Remember Lane Kiffin's youthful looks while you can.

At the end of the season, Brett Favre will announce he's considering retirement. No one will listen.

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CAPTION(S):

3 photos

Photo:

(1 -- 2 -- color) Despite being on the cover of Madden NFL '08, Vince Young, left, will have a better season than Matt Leinart.

Getty Images

(3) Steve Dilbeck says Cowboys receiver Terrell Owens will be seen walking poodles with Whoopi Goldberg this season.

Dave Einsel/Associated Press