APPLES, ANGELS REVOLVE AROUND REPULSIVE FORCES.Byline: JANE ROBISON STARTLING star·tle v. star·tled, star·tling, star·tles v.tr. 1. To cause to make a quick involuntary movement or start. 2. To alarm, frighten, or surprise suddenly. See Synonyms at frighten. news has come to my attention suggesting L.A.'s sister city may not be Nagoya, Japan, as earlier believed, but that great Big Apple in the east - New York City New York City: see New York, city. New York City City (pop., 2000: 8,008,278), southeastern New York, at the mouth of the Hudson River. The largest city in the U.S. . This is a disturbing revelation that's going to take some time to process. However, a growing body of evidence leaves one with little doubt that Angelenos and New Yorkers share several eerie similarities. NYC NYC abbr. New York City NYC New York City Mayor Rudolph Giuliani wants to rid his city of loud, obnoxious, obstinate ob·sti·nate adj. 1. Stubbornly adhering to an attitude, opinion, or course of action. 2. Difficult to alleviate or cure. public nuisances. L.A. Mayor Richard Riordan Richard J. Riordan (born May 1, 1930) is a Republican politician from California, U.S. who served as the California Secretary of Education from 2003–2005 and as Mayor of Los Angeles from 1993–2001. Riordan ran for Governor of California unsuccessfully in 2002. wants to rid his city of the City Council. Same thing. They have Long Island and Staten Island. We have the Valley, which is treated like an island . . . or a penal colony, depending on whose council district you fall under. They have ``Seinfeld,'' a show about New York New York, state, United States New York, Middle Atlantic state of the United States. It is bordered by Vermont, Massachusetts, Connecticut, and the Atlantic Ocean (E), New Jersey and Pennsylvania (S), Lakes Erie and Ontario and the Canadian province of . We film ``Seinfeld,'' a show about nothing. New York City is tackling charter reform, with the City Council and the mayor creating competing charter revision commissions. Ditto in L.A. We have the Dodgers. They don't. But from here, the two cities take divergent paths that, while opposite, are still strangely parallel. What can account for this mutual gravitational grav·i·ta·tion n. 1. Physics a. The natural phenomenon of attraction between physical objects with mass or energy. b. The act or process of moving under the influence of this attraction. 2. attraction that is cosmic in nature and telegenic tel·e·gen·ic adj. Having a physical appearance and exhibiting personal qualities that are deemed highly appealing to television viewers: "Do we insist on a telegenic President?" William F. in scope? Astronomers are increasingly confident that they have detected the first strong evidence that the universe is permeated by a repulsive force, Rudy Giuliani. As conceived by theorists, this force is an energy that acts on a large scale to stretch restraining orders and force people to act against their will to be civil and behave. If the observations are correct, it could resolve a paradox raised by previous controversial suggestions that New York was the center of the universe. Countervailing forces have conspired to strip the Big Apple of that title, and bestow the cosmic center on L.A. Ipso facto [Latin, By the fact itself; by the mere fact.] ipso facto (ip-soh-fact-toe) prep. Latin for "by the fact itself." An expression more popular with comedians imitating lawyers than with lawyers themselves. . Reflecting the excitement touched off by the new findings, Dr. Michael S. Turner, a hoity-toity astrophysicist, told The New York Times: ``This is a remarkable discovery. It means that most of the universe is influenced by an abundance of some weird form of energy whose force is repulsive.'' Have we not been witnessing repulsive forces at work in the City of Angels for some time? Parallel repulsive forces might explain why an old, decaying, putrefied city like New York seems to be experiencing a cultural and economic renaissance while a vibrant, thriving, superior looking city like L.A. seems to be driving people away. For example, New York City's budget fortunes keep getting better while L.A.'s are being flushed down the toilet. It defies explanation. It boggles the mind. Why, for example, has New York been able to harness Disney to spruce up and help revive Times Square, yet we can't get Disney Hall built? How horrible to believe you're living in a first-class world city only to wake up one fine morning and discover - you're not. And then you start grappling with who's leading, who's parroting the other. Granted, we copied their Beggar Begone be·gone v. Used chiefly in the imperative to express an order of dismissal. [Middle English begone : be, imperative of ben, to be; see be + gone Law, driving aggressive panhandlers back into the gutter, and their police FASTRAC program on computer crime. Meanwhile, they seem to be mirroring our city charter struggle and power grab fight between the mayor and the council. Still, I devoutly believe that anything they can do, we can do better. They have a grungy grun·gy adj. grun·gi·er, grun·gi·est Slang In a dirty, rundown, or inferior condition: grungy old jeans. [Origin unknown. , smelly subway system that carries millions of people around the city each day. We have a spotless, shiny new subway system that carries millions of dollars of debt around and reeks of fraud and corruption. They have offensive taxi drivers. Our council agreed in September to spend $100,000 for ``sensitivity training'' for the 4,000 or so men and women who drive taxis in Los Angeles. Their public scourge are car alarms. Big deal. Our public scourge are loud, whiny celebrities who complain about leaf blowers. And while they stole the Grammy Awards from us and now want to give them back, we still have the Academy Awards, the creme de la creme crème de la crème n. 1. Something superlative. 2. People of the highest social level. [French : crème, cream + de, of + la, the + of shindigs. About the only thing we haven't been able to duplicate is Giuliani, their mayor who likes to dress up like Marilyn Monroe and sing at fund-raising dinners. Too bad. I hear Riordan has great gams. |
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