ANGEL OF HOPE CANCER FIGHTER'S LIFE IS HER MESSAGE.

Byline: Amy Raisin Staff Writer

NEWHALL - Fifty-one-year-old Colleen Shaffer opened her door to visitors recently, draped in a bubble-gum pink fairy dress, hot-pink Carol Channing wig and angel's wings on her back.

At 5 feet 10 inches tall, the statuesque character was hardly the picture of a woman battling stage-4 breast cancer that has spread to her spine and liver - which was precisely Shaffer's point. ``Even though a woman feels ugly, you will survive,'' Shaffer said in her living room Tuesday. ``Not only will you survive, you will blossom. You'll find that it gives you an inner strength.''

And a sense of humor.

Shaffer will wear the costume - complete with a sign that reads ``Breast Cancer Angel'' - at the sixth-annual Making Strides Against Breast Cancer 5K Walk on Oct. 20, at the Rose Bowl in Pasadena.

Dressing up as her alter ego, she said, is one more way to draw attention to and promote research for breast cancer, a killer that will claim the lives of an estimated 4,275 people in California this year.

``My biggest problem now is I look normal. I look healthy and vibrant, but I take 40 pills a day,'' said Shaffer, director of breast health for the Santa Clarita unit of the American Cancer Society. ``I'm stage 4. I have nothing to lose. I don't want anyone to lose the element of hope.

``I wanted to be like an angel of hope to show the world that you can have a normal life with metastasized breast cancer.''

The mother of three grown children said her optimistic outlook developed after her first diagnosis in March 1999. Living in countries such as France and Kuwait as the wife of a civil engineer, Shaffer was forced to adapt to foreign languages and customs - an experience that has served her well.

In fact, with her husband, Clyde, stuck overseas, Shaffer went through a double mastectomy and intense rounds of chemotherapy and radiation on her own.

``I looked like Uncle Fester's niece from 'The Addams Family,''' Shaffer said of her bald head and scarred chest. ``I had friends that couldn't cope at all. I learned tricks to get mankind more involved.''

Shaffer would get on the phone and tell a friend to bring her dinner, which gave her a chance to talk about her illness and put the more fearful at ease.

After her double mastectomy, Shaffer underwent a procedure to reconstruct her breasts, using muscles from each of her thighs, a journey that she has documented in a photo album of which she is proud.

She learned in March that the cancer had returned and spread.

Now on an oral form of chemotherapy, Shaffer suffers from chronic diarrhea and hand-foot syndrome - a chemo side effect that turns her hands and feet bright red and causes the skin to crack and peel.

However, she continues to walk for herself and for a cure.

``When I started walking it gave me a sense of independence. I had control of the beast,'' she said.

For information on donations or participating in the Making Strides Against Breast Cancer 5K Walk, call [phone].

``And I'd be happy to answer anyone's questions about anything. We have to talk about it,'' she said. ``When a woman can't talk about breast cancer, that means she hasn't healed.''

You can e-mail Shaffer at clshoney(at)pacbell.net.

CAPTION(S):

2 photos

Photo:

(1 -- color) Colleen Shaffer of Newhall will portray an angel in the Making Strides Against Breast Cancer 5K Walk on Oct. 20.

(2 -- color) Colleen Shaffer shows some of the pins for breast cancer awareness she has collected over the years.

David R. Crane/Staff Photographer