ABC COULDN'T SCRIPT ENDING.

Byline: TOM HOFFARTH The Media

There's no way on God's green gridiron that either Keith Jackson or Bob Griese could call themselves impartial observers of Thursday's Rose Bowl game.

But daggummit, they both tried.

By the time the credits rolled, we had a blubbering play-by-play man and an analyst too choked up to talk.

Jay Rothman, who produced ABC's Michigan-Washington State telecast that ended in an emotional scene that saw Griese's son Brian accept the game's Most Valuable Player award at midfield while Bob and his wife Shea embraced in the press box, fully appreciated the beauty of live TV.

Because for all the restraint this season that went into trying to present a fair and critical telecast, the tears that flowed at the end were genuine.

``There's nothing better than human emotion, and you don't get that in sports too much,'' Rothman said after the game.

The Griese connection was well documented. Bob Griese had already done five ABC telecasts of his son's games this season - the network had backed off this potential conflict of interest until new ABC Sports chief Steve Bornstein approved it.

But Jackson's ties to Washington State also became part of the equation. The dean of college football broadcasting, who plans to retire to his Sherman Oaks home after next season, graduated from WSU when diplomas were really made of sheepskin and has been active in alumni fund raising for years.

Bending over backward to be fair was how Jackson and Griese played it throughout Thursday's telecast, almost to a point of distraction during the first three quarters.

It wasn't until Brian Griese's second touchdown pass of the game in the third quarter to Tai Streets for 58 yards did the broadcast crew finally loosen up a bit.

Said Jackson: ``Brian Griese threw it probably as far as he can throw it.''

Added sideline reporter Lynn Swann: ``Before this season, I didn't think he could throw that deep. But look at that one . . . Bob, my hat's off to your son for throwing the deep ball.''

Bob Griese, as humble a father and under spoken an analyst as he's been all season, let the others do the praising.

``He really has worked hard, and we worked with him on being OK with this situation, trying to allow him to enjoy it,'' said Rothman. ``Since this was our sixth time (doing a Michigan game this year), we didn't think the goal was to hit people over the head (with the relationship), just let it evolve.

``Bob has always been as objective as you can get. He's also low key, not a hyper guy who gives a lot of praise.

``Today, he did an outstanding job, and he helped make it a great story.''

As the Michigan players gathered on the field for the trophy presentation, Jackson was told who won the MVP award.

``Wanna know who?'' he said. ``I'm standing alongside his proud daddy.''

ABC showed Bob Griese standing behind his press-box monitor, wondering what to say next.

``You've about lost me,'' he said, finally hugging his wife who was wearing a Michigan hat.

``If you want to cry, go ahead; I'll hold you up,'' said Jackson, who added after a pause: ``Now you guys got me crying.''

You and everyone else.

``That's special stuff,'' said Rothman.

The other highlights, lowlights and sidelights from the Jan. 1 bowlapaloosa:

Most interesting innovation: ABC tried the cable cam for the first time on a college football game and by the end of the contest, Rothman felt he had a better feel of how to use it.

The camera, which slides on a cable strung about 50 feet along the press box sideline, has been used on ESPN's ``X Games'' and on horse racing. Rothman said it was installed Wednesday, but the network couldn't rehearse with it because no one was allowed on the field.

``I thought we got some real unique looks with it, both live and on replays,'' said Rothman.

Most inconsistent audio: Again, the Rose Bowl.

Between the blaring public-address announcer, the crowd noise and the whistles, a good chunk of what Jackson and Griese were saying during critical plays was drowned out.

Top cliches: Pick any of them by CBS' Gus Johnson during the Cotton Bowl telecast.

How about when Texas A&M had UCLA at the Bruins 1 and Skip Hicks was nearly tackled for a safety in the third quarter: ``A&M smells blood, and they're pinning their ears back.''

It's hard to say who is CBS' No. 2 college football broadcast team after all the hype that goes into the Sean McDonough-Terry Donahue pairing. Analyst Mike Mayock, who sounds like a coach in training, at least added some perspective while Johnson and sideline reporter Mike Harris rattled on about the play of A&M linebacker Dat Nguyen while the Bruins were mounting their comeback.

Worst corporate sponsor placement: The Rogaine Bowl Report?

Maybe the company's new mission statement is to fertilize sports TV with new advertising dollars in hopes of locating the target folliclely challenged audience. But could you be a little more subtle?

SOUND BYTES

WHAT SMOKES

While that small-but-mighty fX channel has elbowed its way into 65 percent of the 1.8 million cable homes in L.A., most of the Valley should have no trouble finding Saturday's UCLA-Arizona Pacific-10 basketball opener. Even Time-Warner in the West Valley, which Thursday flipped the switch and got FX to 35,000 of its 110,000 customers on Channel 49, will provide the game to its other homes on Channel 25.

ESPN ``SportsCenter'' anchor dude Dan Patrick joins the XTRA-AM (690) new morning show with John Fricke and Sean Salisbury beginning Monday. Station operations manager Bill Pugh said Patrick will make three-to-four appearances a week in the 7 a.m. hour to give his takes on whatever is in the news. Fricke and Patrick go way back to their days working at CNN Sports. Pugh and Patrick farther back than that. In fact, Dan is Bill's little brother (Patrick changed his last name when he got into the biz).

WHAT CHOKES

ABC Sports flew Dan Dierdorf, Robin Roberts and Leslie Visser into town (joining John Naber), yet none of the four were dispatched to Pasadena for the big Rose Bowl game coverage. Since ABC equates a mobile floral display, marching bands and horse riding with a sporting event, the crew was employed to offer its expertise in float decoration, drum-major etiquette and equine maintenance. Dierdorf and Roberts were the network's answer to our Bob Eubanks and Stephanie Edwards while Visser and Naber were the breathless ``on-route'' reporters. Dierdorf once told us, ``22 different people were riding'' on the float from Thailand, which Roberts was so taken by she blurted: ``Talk about dramatic!'' Visser's tenacious reporting skills net her one of the morning's best pieces of trivial information - Burbank officials were so worried that their mobile piece of art might break down on the slow ride over that they filled the tires under the float with foam instead of air. Which is something Dierdorf might consider for himself.

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