A table for one; EATING OUT: Tam has to dine alone in this Spanish eaterie but at least the good food at bargain prices takes the edge off his solo stint LA TASCA 9 SOUTH CHARLOTTE STREET, EDINBURGH.

Byline: BY TAM COWAN 

You've probably heard the one about the guy unloading his shopping basket at the express checkout in Asda.

Before he gets the chance to pay for his items (a small tin of beans, two rashers of bacon, a half loaf and two eggs) the girl operating the till says: "I take it that you're single, sir?"

"That's right," he replies."Were the contents of my basket a giveaway?"

"No," she says. "It's just that you're a right ugly b*****d."

Anyway, folks, when it comes to eating alone, I'm afraid I must take issue with Delia Smith. According her old BBC2 series, One Is Fun.

Aye, right.

I also disagree with anyone who says there's no such thing as a free lunch.

You see, that's exactly what was up for grabs last Wednesday lunchtime.

Incredibly, though, despite the fact there are currently 183 names on the waiting-list to join yours truly for a restaurant review (yes, it's amazing how so many friends and family have crawled out of the woodwork since I started this gig) nobody was available for an afternoon bite at La Tasca.

And so (sniff) poor old TC was forced to ask for a table for one.

As you can imagine, the chat was pretty poor (almost non-existent, in fact) but that's the way I like it when I'm flying solo.

Well, have you ever tried taking notes while wearing a straitjacket?

However, the bill was very agreeable. Easily the cheapest nosh-up since my mate Brendan and I sampled the two-for-one deal at Wetherspoon's in Glasgow city centre and filled our faces for the princely sum of pounds 4.99.

I've already reviewed La Tasca. In the dim and distant past (1999, I think) I visited the Glasgow branch of this UK franchise and, if memory serves, it was bursting at the seams and four of us had to wait until 9.45pm for a table.

Not bad for a Tuesday night and, sure enough, the food was pretty impressive. Seven years on, I enjoyed my trip to the Edinburgh outlet on South Charlotte Street, slap-bang in the heart of the city centre.

The dark wooden furniture and yellow walls give it an authentically warm Spanish feel and the guitar music blasting from the CD was reminiscent of Manuel serenading his pet "hamster" in a classic episode of Fawlty Towers.

The candlelit tables suggest it's a pretty atmospheric place at night and, according to the blackboard on the wall, reservations are strongly advised for the flamenco nights - if you're into that sort of thing.

The a la carte menu looked pretty good - apart from the fact I'd have been unable to sample La Tasca's paella as it's only available for a minimum of two people - but I tried the pounds 4.95 "rapido" menu.

Just yards from Princes Street and in the shadow of Edinburgh Castle, it seemed an unlikely bargain that was too good to miss.

The "platos combinados" allows you to choose any three tapas from a decent choice of 12 dishes.

I plumped for the chorizo frito al vino (spicy Spanish sausage pan-fried in red wine), croquetas de pollo (chicken croquettes with garlic mayo) and albondigas a la jardinera (La Tasca's famous meatballs in a vegetable and tomato sauce).

I suppose the very essence of tapas is probably all about sharing (sob) but I enjoyed my lunch and, in terms of quality and quantity, I'd recommend the three dishes I ordered.

The chorizo was nice and spicy in apiping hot pool of sauce, the chicken croquetteswere plump and tasty with asatisfying crunch, and the meatballs in a wonderfully thick sauce were probably the pick of the bunch.

Terrific value for pounds 4.95, although the cost soon adds up by the time you've ordered some garlic bread (pounds 2.30) and a couple of small bottles of water (pounds 1.20 a pop).

A dessert from the a la carte menu (pounds 4.50-ish) would have taken the shine off a genuine bargain, so I quit while I was ahead and cheerfully squared-up the pounds 9.65 bill.

Overall, I really enjoyed my second visit to La Tasca and I think you'd be mad to miss the lunchtime special if you're one of the thousands who must work just yards from its front door.

Apart from a slightly disappointing garlic bread (how come restaurants never toast it on both sides?) I couldn't really fault the place and I made a point of leaving a pounds 5 tip.

That's more than 50 per cent!

Think how generous I might have been if the waiter or waitress had come over and sat down with the loner at table three...

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TAM'S HOT PLATE CONTENDERS

LA TASCA 9 STH CHARLOTTE ST, EDINBURGH

Tel: [phone].

Open: Seven days11am to 11pm

Wheelchair access: Yes

Bill for one: pounds 9.65

Food: 4/5 - freshly prepared, piping hot

Service: 4/5 - friendly and attentive

Decor: 4/5 - warm and inviting

Toilets: 4/5 - clean and tidy

Value: 4/5 - terrific lunchtime deal

Total: 20/25

20/25 Platform 1, Stow Brae, Paisley. Tel: [phone]

20/25 La Tasca, 9 South Charlotte St, Edinburgh. Tel: [phone]

19/25 La Capannina, Main Street, West Calder. Tel: [phone]

The current Hot Plate winner is Catch 22, 158 Bath Street, Glasgow. 0141 331 6222

'The dark wooden furniture, yellow walls and guitar music from the CD give it an authentically warm Spanish feel'

CAPTION(S):

THE RAIL THING... La Tasca