A hacker saint?

A recent article in the computer-hacker quarterly 2600 Magazine (Summer 2001) explains "how a hacker can become an official `saint' as declared by the pope. How likely is this to happen? Not very. But in theory it is possible." The article warns its hacker readers, "If you don't like attention--committees examining your every deed, interviewing other people about you, or reading everything that you wrote--perhaps being a saint isn't for you."

J-Fast, the pseudonymous author of the article, notes that "As a hacker, you are already treated poorly by the media. You are prosecuted unjustly and reviled by the common person--similar to how Christians were viewed back in the old days. But in order to be considered a saint, you must go beyond this. You must die an awful torturous death in the name of the church."

The magazine points out that a "less painful way to become a saint is to live an ascetic life. Hey, we hackers are already good at this! We spend hours alone at our computers."

J-Fast notes that in the church's official canonization process "you'll need at least two miracles to your credit. Even worse, only miracles after your death count." He advises, "Probably the best way to perform miracles after your death is via software that acts in the future. Perhaps a date triggers a virus or some other spectacular change in computers all around the world. I know, I know, this is a long shot."

In conclusion, "it's not impossible for a hacker to become a saint but it is pretty damn hard.... Considering the large time frame, the extremely difficult tasks of performing miracles after your death, and the possibility of ... being brutally tortured, it may not be worth it after all."