A goodnight kiss.. then my girl took her own life; Mum's anguish over suicide of 14-year-old Sarah-Jane.Byline: LISA ADAMS Lisa Adams is a painter. Some of her works are Too Fat to Fly 1997, My Mouth 1997, and Shower Head 1997.
ISOBEL KETTLES relaxed in a bath as her 14-year-old daughter, Sarah- Jane, chatted happily about her day.
She had no idea it was to be the last time she ever spoke to her daughter.
Hours later, the teenager was dead after taking an overdose.
Isobel said yesterday: "I had absolutely no idea anything was wrong. There was no hint that anything was troubling her.
"She kissed me goodnight and, like I'd done so many times before, I told her I'd see her in the morning.
"It never for a second crossed my mind that I wouldn't."
Sarah-Jane's bright smile masked how desperate she was feeling. Two hours later she took more than 100 painkillers.
Isobel, from Kilsyth, Stirlingshire has endlessly replayed the night of August 17, 2000, in her mind.
She said: "I was woken up by a thud and went to investigate.
"I found Sarah-Jane face down across the bed. She looked like had been crying but her lips had turned blue. I thought she'd had some kind of fit."
Later, four empty bottles of pills and a suicide note A suicide note is a message left by someone who later attempts or commits suicide. It is estimated that 12-20% of suicides are accompanied by a note. However, incidence rates may depend on race, method of suicide, and cultural differences and may reach rates as high were found in a drawer.
Isobel said: "A part of me died that day too. I never had a chance to say good-bye.
"If it had been a road accident or an illness it might have been a bit easier to accept - but not this."
The letter didn't provide any answers. Isobel continued: "She said she loved us. There was even a PS apologising if she'd used pills we needed.
"None of it made sense. I asked for the letter to be burnt eventually. If I hadn't, I'd have just dwelt dwelt
A past tense and a past participle of dwell. on it."
Isobel thinks the problems may have started a year earlier.
She said: "My mum died from cancer and that hit Sarah Jane Sarah Jane can refer to:
Then, a gang of boys at her school, Kilsyth Academy, started teasing Sarah-Jane, and she struggled to handle it.
Isobel said: "These boys depressed her. They were teasing her about her size and her big bust in particular. When she told me we went up to the school to sort it out.
"The boys apologised and I thought that was the end of it. When I asked Sarah-Jane if everything was fine, she'd say yes."
During the summer holidays, Sarah-Jane seemed her usual sunny self.
Isobel said: "She looked very grown-up grown-up
1. Of, characteristic of, or intended for adults: grown-up movies; a grown-up discussion.
2. , so people treated her that way too. I know now that was a mistake. There was still a little girl in there trying to catch up."
The thought of going back to school after the holidays may have proved too much for Sarah- Jane. She died days before she was due to start her third year.
Explaining to her brother and sister, Christopher, 10, and Amy, seven, what had happened was a struggle.
Then the days and months after the funeral After the Funeral is a work of detective fiction by Agatha Christie and first published in the US by Dodd, Mead and Company in 1953 under the title of Funerals are Fatal put an unbearable strain on Isobel's marriage. Last year, she and husband James decided to split up.
She said: "I felt so much pain inside me that I couldn't offer any comfort to my husband. I had nothing left to give.
"I think if a teenager is determined to take their own life there's not a lot you can do to stop them - but it's vital we reach out to our youngsters."
That's why Isobel is backing our campaign. She feels Scotland's teenagers desperately need tailor-made help.
She said: "There should be a crisis worker available day and night so teenagers can get help.
"When they need help, it's immediate - tomorrow is simply too late."