A cyber world of hurt; Harassment can be endless.

Byline: Danielle M. Williamson

Denija Berbic knows she shouldn't care about the insults her ex-boyfriend hurls her way in cyberspace. The relationship ended and she has moved on.

Yet, the 16-year-old can't resist the temptation of incessantly checking her MySpace page or glancing at her cell phone to see if she has gotten an offensive message. She fidgets through her classes, anxious to check her phone.

"I want to know what he says. I kind of need to know," the Leominster High School sophomore said. "But it stresses me out, and I'll get mad and flip out. It's not really a good thing."

Miss Berbic admits she has been a victim and perpetrator of cyber bullying, the use of computers or cell phones to harass or intimidate. She said last month she was in the middle of a "MySpace fight," which involves teens posting confrontational statements to each other on someone's homepage, often underneath a picture.

Worcester District Attorney Joseph D. Early Jr. cited 2005 research that showed 34 percent of 1,500 Internet-using adolescents had experienced cyber bullying and said his office has hosted nearly 300 assemblies and training sessions on the subject since January 2007. The trend, authorities say, contributes to anxiety, absenteeism and emotional problems, and often escalates into physical violence. Leominster High has a bully liaison to help combat and prevent such behavior, and in Worcester school officials are seeking approval for a disciplinary policy that speaks specifically to cyber bullying.

"Kids can really make other kids' lives a living hell," Mr. Early said. "One student told us he'd rather take a physical beating, because that has a start and an end time. But with cyber bullying, it goes on and on."

Experts say nonverbal communication, through messages sent on computers or cell phones, emboldens teens to make statements they likely wouldn't say in person. Cyber bullies may post an unflattering picture of a student, taken from a cell phone camera, on the Web to solicit ridicule. Many teens don't think twice about sharing their passwords with peers, but if the relationship turns sour, the password can be used to steal an online identity and instigate fights.

Miss Berbic said her ex-boyfriend used her MySpace password to delete all her online friends and post derogatory messages as if he were her.

"I've had panic attacks about it," she said. "Before we had the Internet or cell phones, you'd have to say something to someone's face. Now, it's so much easier."

Once her ex-boyfriend initiated the bullying, Miss Berbic said, she gave it right back to him. "He'd say something bad, then I'd say something worse."

Shawn Weld, a social worker at Leominster High, serves as a bully liaison, keeping tabs on students' online behavior and often advising parents and teachers.

Mr. Weld said cyber bullying stems from relational aggression, behavior intended to harm a student's social status or esteem.

"The biggest source of happiness and stress for most teens begins and ends with friendships," Mr. Weld said. "This really does affect everybody, from the most popular students on down."

Cyber bullying can be hard to control because the students perpetuating the bullying are often more technology-savvy than the adults who are trying to monitor them. A teen will post a nasty comment online, but delete it before it reaches an adult's hands, Mr. Weld said.

"In the classrooms, it's real hard for teachers to pick up on this," Mr. Weld said. "If a kid is tripped or pushed, that's easy to see. But a lot of times, the student may be getting a harassing text message at her desk."

Most schools prohibit students from using cell phones in class, but students say that they simply keep them on silent or vibrate mode in their pocket, hidden from view.

Leominster High junior Amanda Doucet, 17, said her MySpace page was tampered with by an "ex-friend" who had her password.

She said she used to get caught up in the fights, but now she just sets her Internet preferences to block former friends who post inappropriate comments.

"Everyone's obsessed with drama," she said.

Robert F. Pezzella, the Worcester superintendent's executive assistant for school safety and violence prevention, estimates his office has handled 50 cyber bullying incidents per year since the phenomenon gained popularity in fall 2006.

"Most of this is happening outside the school and carries over into school," he said. "There are threats, intimidation, bullying, even gang-recruitment, through sites such as MySpace, Facebook and YouTube. Most parents want to trust their kids to use the computer without supervision, but I think more and more parents are realizing they have to be a little more influential."

Mr. Pezzella and other administrators have drafted a policy for cyber bullying, which the Worcester School Committee is expected to review in May or June. Officials now refer to the district's written threats policy when handing out discipline, which has ranged from mediation to a suspension of several days.

"We've seen such an increase that we're putting in a new rule that specifically states any student caught making a verbal or written threat can be long-term suspended," Mr. Pezzella said.

Sometimes, the bullying makes its way to the courts. In the more serious instances, a student may be charged with personal identity theft, interception of wire and oral communications, unauthorized access to computer systems and criminal harassment.

Assistant District Attorney Donald G. Xenos, director of Mr. Early's juvenile division, estimates that cyber bullying is a component in up to 20 percent of juvenile cases. Often, a judge will order young defendants to take their MySpace pages down as a condition of probation.

Jamie Hellen, chief of staff for state Sen. Robert A. Antonioni, D-Leominster, said he is working with Mr. Antonioni on a bill that would mandate that all school districts have a plan to handle bullying.

"We're trying to get our arms around the cyber bullying issue," Mr. Hellen said.

Mr. Antonioni said the legislation may move forward as early as this spring.

Contact Danielle Williamson by e-mail at [e-mail].

Cyber bullying victimization 

Online poll of 1,500 Internet-using adolescents in 2005

34.4% said they had experienced cyber bullying

55.6% said their cyber bully experience occurred in chat rooms

48.9% reported that they were bullied by e-mail

34% of cyber bully victims said they felt frustrated

More than 40% of cyber bully victims didn't tell anyone about their experience.

14.3% of youth told their parent(s), teacher or another adult.

Source:Research summary, "Cyberbullying victimization," Sameer Hinduja, Florida Atlantic University; Justin W. Patchin, University of Wisconsin-Eau Claire 

Signs of a cyber bully

Sends hateful, derogatory, harassing or threatening online messages.

Spreads rumors slamming someone's repuation.

Forwards private message to someone else without the original person's permission.

Uses someone's online screen name to socially ostracize and embarrass them.

Creates a website/social networking site profile with offensive or embarrassing photos and comments with the intention of intimidating, scaring, ridiculing or causing harm to another.

MySpace.com Safety tips

Don't lie about your age.

Set your profile to private.

Hide "online now" so no one can see when you're online.

Don't accept everyone as a friend. Require their email or last name and other personal information before you add them.

Approve comments from friends before posting.

Do not fill out your profile entirely. There's no reason to include date of birth, school and work information.

Check "no pic forwarding" so people you don't know cannot send emails with links to your pictures.

Don't post information about upcoming events, parties, parents going away.

Don't post harassing comments about someone else.

Source: Worcester County District Attorney Joseph D. Early Jr.'s office.

ART: PHOTOS

CUTLINE: (1) Amanda Doucet, 17, a junior, checks her cell phone for text messages in the office of Leominster High School social worker Shawn Weld as the two talk about cyber bullying. (2) Denija Berbic, 16, a sophomore at Leominster High School, talks about cyber bullying in a counselor's office.

PHOTOG: T&G Staff Photos/RICK CINCLAIR