A channel of our own. (notes from a blond).

There's this producer out here who has got to be pushing 80. He's got six ex-wives, roughly one per decade, his most recent being 20 years younger than his oldest daughter. I worked with him on a project many years ago, so many that we used to meet at the long-defunct Playboy Club, where he would enjoy watching the bunny-waitresses bend over and attempt to keep their boobs from winding up in the martinis like huge, pale olives. So I was surprised to hear from him the other day with the following intriguing proposal: "Let's go to the networks and sell them The Gay Bachelor."

This may not seem all that significant to you, but out here, when a character who has been making fag jokes since the Jurassic Age decides he wants to jump Gucci loafer-clad feet first into what he used to regard as our moral swamp, trust me, it's big. It means that we are being swept up in the ultimate mainstream American acceptance: Even the fossils think they can make real money with us.

The fact that he is willing to walk into any of the majors with this idea--and that he feels he can without being laughed at--means that the Santa Ana winds are a-changin'. Of course, the places where he can sell his brainstorm are limited. The Christian Broadcasting Network is probably out.

He's probably in for some big-time rejection anyway--the town is built on it. More than one person will steer him to the phantom gay cable network, now known as Outlet, that Viacom is allegedly fielding through its Showtime and MTV units.

Outlet keeps announcing things, but don't change the batteries in your remote because you're not finding the station on your box. So far all it's produced are meetings, many of which are undoubtedly with cutting-edge fellows who want to do The Gay Bachelor.

There doesn't appear to be a great deal of heat being generated in getting Outlet on the air any time soon. Perhaps that's because the only comparable service, Canada's PrideVision channel, is proving to be a massive washout. Launched with a great deal of, well, pride, the channel has laid off just about everybody on staff and slashed its original programming to just two shows: a weekly chat, Jawbreaker, and a weekly sports show, Locker Room.

Part of the reason for its sickly state is said to be a problem that is not exclusively Canadian. In order to receive PrideVision, a subscriber must go to his cable company and order it, which, like it or not, is tantamount to coming out, especially in smaller markets where everybody knows everybody else.

The channel is so specifically programmed to Us that cable companies are loath to include it in a package with other channels, thus making it appear to be something some people don't want, even for free. PrideVision itself doesn't want to be lumped in with other channels, because that will eliminate what its spokeswoman calls "erotica," which it may wish to program from time to time.

Customers in big cities are less than thrilled with some of PrideVision's programming, which runs to much-seen movies featuring the usual suspects (Liza, Barbra, Bette) instead of expensive original shows. Even more troubling is the chorus of people here and in the Great White North who don't particularly see the need for a gay channel, preferring to drown them selves in the mainstream.

What makes America--OK, North America--great is the pluralism of our society. This is what Osama's boys hate about us. We celebrate our diversity. And we make money doing it. Now that we are beginning to be actively acknowledged as a fabric in the American tapestry, it's more important than ever that we reinforce our individuality, just like every other individual identity in America. A TV channel, no matter how frivolous the initial programming attempts, is a fine channel for that. Besides, how bad can it be to come out to a cute cable guy?