A Fowl Disturbance, Bicycle Retraining and Music for the Board.

No Stopping This Test

Something was definitely afoul on the opening day of standardized testing in Putnam County, W.Va., last spring.

Just as 3rd-grade teacher Judy Richardson was distributing testing booklets, pencils and paper at Confidence Elementary School in Red House, W.Va., a noisy ruckus was unfolding in the school library right next to her classroom. Richardson said she stormed into the library "ready to spit nails." There she encountered five colleagues in wild pursuit of a loose chicken that had wandered through an outside door propped open because of the beautiful spring weather.

Once the animal was bounced from the site, Putnam Superintendent Sam Sentelle expressed relief about preserving the integrity of the testing environment. "We are so thankful the intruder was not a cow," he quipped.

In Need of Retraining 

Michael Hickey, superintendent in Howard County, Md., is an avid and experienced cyclist, but earlier this year he took a spill and fractured a hand. So Hickey was wearing a cast on his lower arm when he stopped in to visit a kindergarten classroom.

Curiosity couldn't stop the pupils from peppering the superintendent with questions. When he explained he had fallen off his bike, one little girl with thick glasses looked up at him with wide eyes and asked knowingly, "Didn't you have your training wheels on?"

A Calming Influence

If the school board in Dallas, Texas--known for its share of volatility in recent years--ever requires a more meditative and relaxed setting, board members need only turn to their official spokesperson, Jon Dahlander.

Dahlander, who serves as special assistant to the superintendent for communications, is an accomplished pianist whose New Age works have been likened to those of John Tesh, former co-host of the TV show "Entertainment Tonight." What's more, Dahlander's enchanting piano solos have been recorded on a pair of CDs. He's played at several school functions, including a retirement dinner, in the last year.

"I try to keep the two careers separate," he says. "It's not like I'm giving concerts here at the school administration building."

He Knows His Title

The School Administrator doesn't usually pay much heed to spelling bees, but we couldn't avoid noticing that Megan Becker, 14, of Gilbertsville, Pa., a contestant in June's National Spelling Bee in Washington, D.C., was bounced from the competition in the second round when she was unable to spell the word "superintendent."

Charles Amuso, who serves as superintendent of the Boyertown Area School District that includes Gilbertsville, had to wonder whether his junior high teachers ought to add his title to students' required spelling lists. Said Amuso: "I'm sorry she missed on that word. I'd better do my job better" by being higher profile.

Amuso admitted that in his 8th-grade spelling bee, he missed the word "executive." "I've never misspelled it since," he noted.

Applied Skills

Joe Piazza learned a lot about keeping order among unruly students during his first year as an elementary school principal in Clarksburg, Calif. He figured those skills in conflict resolution might be handy as a member of the California State Assembly.

Piazza, a Republican, tried unsuccessfully to be his party's nominee this year for the state's 10th Assembly District, located just outside Sacramento. He was endorsed by the Association of California School Administrators.

Said Piazza, who also serves as director of state and federal programs in the River Delta Unified School District: "Being a school principal is the ultimate in multitasking. Who knows better what is important and what is not?"

Que Pasa?

Seen aboard a subway car in New York City where the board of education has posted advertising placards for teaching vacancies: "Our schools need certified bilingual professionals qualified in the areas of ...." before listing several academic areas.

A star next to six of the 10 subjects led to a footnote at the bottom of the ad, which read: "Qualified applicants need not be bilingual."

(Source: The New York Times)

A Principal Failure

The annual "Principal for a Day" program in the New York City Public Schools typically attracts some sterling role models from the celebrity ranks who live and work in the Big Apple.

But organizers were taken aback a year ago when they watched the irrepressible financier Donald J. Trump offer free sneakers to students at Public School 70 in the Bronx, where he was assigned for the day.

The out-of-place gesture prompted one especially astute 11-year-old to question the billionaire Trump why he was distributing shoes when he could just as easily offer scholarships.

Needless to say, Trump was not invited back to this year's Principal for a Day.

(Source: The New York Times)

Short humorous anecdotes, quips, quotations and malapropisms for this column relating to school district administration and school board governance should be addressed to: Editor, The School Administrator, 1801 N. Moore St., Arlington, Va. 22209. Fax: [phone].