A DATE WITH CHARLIE SCREENWRITER KAUFMAN SWEATS THE DETAILS OF A STAR-STUDDED STAGED READING AT UCLA.

Byline: Evan Henerson Theater Writer

By most standards, Charlie Kaufman is a little odd.

In ``Being John Malkovich,'' a puppeteer finds a portal that takes you - literally - into the head of the movie star. And in ``Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind,'' a couple played by Kate Winslet and Jim Carrey have their memories erased after their breakup.

His script for ``Adaptation'' included characters called Charlie and Donald Kaufman, who were also credited as the screenwriters. They received an Oscar nomination, although one was fictional.

But before screenwriter Kaufman turned Hollywood inside out with his trippy scripts, he had theatrical ambitions. Kaufman's career as a playwright may have gotten derailed - three Oscar-nominated screenplays will do that - but now he's back with a one-act play called ``Hope Leaves the Theater.''

Well, it's really a staged reading, with live music and sound effects, designed for radio broadcast. Among its cast are Hope Davis, Peter Dinklage and Oscar-winning actress Meryl Streep, one of the stars of ``Adaptation.''

Also on the ``Theater of the New Ear'' bill is ``Anomalisa,'' by someone called Francis Fregoli - a name widely believed to be a pseudonym. The plays open tonight at UCLA's Royce Hall. Film composer Carter Burwell supplies the music, which is performed by the eight-piece on-stage band Parabola.

The last time Kaufman wrote anything for the stage - ``The Fat VIP'' - theatergoers were not exactly blown out of their seats, or so says the self-effacing screenwriter. Audiences and critics were fine with it, but Kaufman hated the experience of seeing the play come to life.

``It was not a very good production,'' Kaufman says about ``The Fat VIP,'' which told the story of ``the most loved man in the world who accidentally robs a bank and becomes the most hated man in the world.''

``We saw it the night the opening-night audience saw it, and we were cringing. We couldn't believe how wrong it was in every way.''

Now, Kaufman's fretting again, worried that ``Hope Leaves the Theater'' would be a ``Fat VIP'' repeat.

``He was very nervous about the piece, wasn't sure if it was working, and he tinkered and rewrote it,'' recalls Davis, who performed it in New York City. ``He was stunned that first night when the audience was blown away. He was worried that we wouldn't be able to sell tickets in L.A. We were like, 'Charlie - don't worry.' ''

What, exactly, is the story all about?

Answering that question is a little like trying to give a quickie sketch of Kaufman's ``Being John Malkovich'' or ``Adaptation.'' There is a character in ``Hope Leaves the Theater'' - played by Hope Davis - who is watching a play, and decides to, yes, exit the building. Sort of. We follow her home through the streets of L.A. as she encounters numerous characters played by Dinklage and Streep.

Except that Hope Davis doesn't live in L.A. Oh, and her character's name is Louise. And she doesn't really leave the theater at all.

``It's interesting to me, the idea that you're leaving the performance you're supposedly watching, but it's still going on in some reality that is still happening, but you're not there,'' muses Kaufman. ``I like that notion. And of course, all this is happening while all three actors are just sitting there on stage. No one goes anywhere.''

Confused? Well, if it's any comfort, the performers feel your reality-tripping pain ... even if they also think you're in for a cool evening.

``We were all wondering and kind of worrying about what it would be like to be an audience member,'' says Davis (``American Splendor,'' ``About Schmidt''). ``There's nothing all that visual. It's actors sitting on stools. But we did it in New York for three nights, and everyone I know said it was one of the most exciting evenings of theater they remembered. People were incredibly intrigued by the form.''

``It just takes you somewhere,'' agrees Dinklage (``The Station Agent,'' CBS' ``Threshold''), ``and because it's a radio play, with the music and sound effects, it's great when you close your eyes and listen to it. Charlie's such a brilliant man and so original. I'll do anything he wants me to do.''

Streep and Dinklage had both worked with Kaufman before, but Kaufman didn't know Davis. He had admired her work in the film ``Mumford,'' a performance that, according to Kaufman, stole the movie even though Davis was playing a character with no energy.

So he cold-called her, and his timing couldn't have been better. Davis was about to give birth to her second child and was interested, a few months down the line, in working in something that didn't have a lengthy time commitment.

``He called and said, 'I'm doing this thing, but you probably don't want to be a part of it,' '' says Davis. ``I said, 'Of course, I do - count me in.'

``He's just the loveliest kind of most humble guy,'' she adds. ``We all loved the piece so much, and we had a lot of laughs. Somebody asked if we'd be willing to do it on Broadway for a couple of weeks, and we all said we wanted to. It will be hard if we have to let it go.''

Apart from any future radio broadcasts, any future rendering of Theater of the New Ear seems limited. A film adaptation wouldn't work, says Kaufman, and there's no sense in staging another reading without the original cast.

``It's also kind of great, in a way, that there's no money to be made from it. It exists only in its specific form and will never exist again,'' he says.

For its earlier engagements in New York and London, ``Hope Leaves the Theater'' was paired with the radio play ``Sawbones'' by Joel and Ethan Coen, which featured John Goodman, Marcia Gay Harden and Steve Buscemi. ``Anomalisa's'' cast includes Jennifer Jason Leigh, Tom Noonan and David Thewlis.

The ``Sawbones'' pairing worked well, says Kaufman, who anticipates an equally seamless blend with ``Anomalisa'' but won't reveal the name of the real author of the piece.

``There's some information in the program,'' Kaufman says mysteriously. ``It's not necessarily accurate, but it's there.''

Evan Henerson, [phone]

evan.henerson(at)dailynews.com

THEATER OF THE NEW EAR

Where: Royce Hall, UCLA.

When: 8 p.m. today through Friday.

Tickets: $38 to $60. Call [phone] or visit www.UCLALive.org.

CAPTION(S):

6 photos

Photo:

(1 -- cover -- color) Meryl Streep

(2 -- cover -- color) Mick Jagger 

(3 -- cover -- color) Gwen Stefani

(4 -- cover -- color) `Lords of Creation: The Origions of Sacred Maya Kingship' at LACMA 

(5) no caption (Charlie Kaufman)

(6) - Hope Davis