15 things you couldn't give any less of a crap about: my favorite ditch in the whole world.1. THIS DITCH IS JUST OUTSIDE of San Marcos, Texas San Marcos is a city in Texas, USA. The population was 34,733 at the 2000 census. It is the county seat of Hays County.GR6 Texas State University-San Marcos (formerly Southwest Texas State University) is located in the city. . San Marcos San Marcos (săn mär`kəs). 1 City (1990 pop. 38,974), San Diego co., S Calif., a northern suburb of San Diego; settled 1880s, inc. 1963. has a spring-fed fiver that runs through it that is inhabited by nutria nutria (n  `trēə) or coypu (koi`p . Nutria are a semi-aquatic rodent native to South America South America, fourth largest continent (1991 est. pop. 299,150,000), c.6,880,000 sq mi (17,819,000 sq km), the southern of the two continents of the Western Hemisphere. which was first introduced to the United States United States, officially United States of America, republic (2005 est. pop. 295,734,000), 3,539,227 sq mi (9,166,598 sq km), North America. The United States is the world's third largest country in population and the fourth largest country in area. to enhance the fur trade fur trade, in American history. Trade in animal skins and pelts had gone on since antiquity, but reached its height in the wilderness of North America from the 17th to the early 19th cent. , and arrived in Dorchester, Maryland in 1943. 2. THERE IS A FACTORY next to the ditch called C-Fan, so some people call it C-Fan ditch. Back in the day the factory was called C-Tech, so all the OG's call it C-Tech ditch. I personally call it Shred Town USA. 3. BACK IN THE '90s learned how to do 360 flips to fakie Fakie is, in skateboarding, a synonym for riding backwards on a skateboard. When used in conjunction with a trick name, like "fakie ollie", it means that the trick was performed while with your normal back foot as the front foot on the nose of the board, rather than the back of the at this ditch. They were really sloppy and low and not much to write home about. I can still do them but nowadays they look about twice as bad. 4. I USED TO HAVE an old 1987 Chevy Cavalier and one day I drove it to the edge of the ditch and rolled in off the hood. I was all by myself though so all my friends assume I'm lying about that. 5. ANOTHER TIME IN THE '90s when I was in "hip hop hip-hop or hip hop n. 1. A popular urban youth culture, closely associated with rap music and with the style and fashions of African-American inner-city residents. 2. Rap music. adj. mode" I was skating this ditch with some baggy cargo pants cargo pants or trousers Noun, pl loose trousers with a large external pocket on the side of each leg , a tank top, and a sweatband. When I saw a car pull up I took off the headband because I was embarrassed. I left the tank top on though ... 6. ONE TIME I WAS SKATING this ditch by myself and my skateboard hit me really hard in the testicles Testicles Also called testes or gonads, they are part of the male reproductive system, and are located beneath the penis in the scrotum. Mentioned in: Testicular Cancer, Testicular Surgery, Vasectomy and I fell down and rolled to the bottom of the ditch. While I was laying there I realized I was out in the country all by myself hanging out in a drainage ditch and that if I was seriously hurt, most likely nobody would find me for a few days. When my nuts felt better I kept skating. 7. THERE ARE WHEEL-SIZED drainage holes near the bottom of the ditch and if you do a trick and then roll over one and don't eat crap then everybody who is watching always goes, "Oooooohhhhhhhhhhh." 8. MY DAD USED TO DRIVE ME and my friends to this ditch when I was a kid. When I have kids I plan on driving them to this ditch too. Or just sticking them in daycare so they don't interfere with my drinking. 9. ONE TIME SOMEBODY spray-painted "Don't Graffiti This Ditch" in the ditch, and well ... that's just so fucking stupid I can't even write about it. 10. BACK WHEN I WAS CONCERNED with keeping my street skills in cheek, I used to make sure I kickflipped down the small bank in the ditch at least once per session. Which is about the equivalent of kickflipping down three or four stairs. In retrospect, maybe I never even had any "street skills." 11. ONE TIME I FELL hard at this ditch and was convinced that I had torn some of those important things that hold your knee together. Three beers later I was convinced that three more beers would fix the problem. 12. IN THE LAST COUPLE of months there have been some major improvements made to this ditch. I wish I could say that I had something to do with those improvements, but the only thing I've ever done to make this ditch better was cleaning some of the concrete off with my cheek. 13. THERE'S ANOTHER PART of this ditch on the other side of the road that isn't nearly as good as this side. And it's also right next to the highway so it would probably be harder to hide your beer from the Department of Public Safety. 14. ONCE MY FRIENDS AND I went to skate this ditch and while we were there about three other car loads of dudes from Austin showed up to skate and then out of nowhere another two carloads of dudes from San Antonio showed up to skate too. In my mind I shredded the hardest that day but that's because I have low self-esteem so I make shit up in my mind all the time. 15. ONE TIME I WAS DRIVING to this ditch and I saw a dude whose car had broken down and I stopped and asked if he needed help (we do that kind of shit in Texas) and the guy asked me if I'd give him a ride up the road to his workplace and I said yes and I gave him a ride and it turned out that he was a guard at the local juvenile detention center. If you're still reading this then you should probably get a drug habit. It's not like you're doing anything worthwhile with your life anyways an·y·ways adv. Nonstandard In any case. Adv. 1. anyways - used to indicate that a statement explains or supports a previous statement; "Anyhow, he is dead now"; "I think they're asleep; anyhow, they're quiet"; "I . |
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