10 things we love this month

You're thinking, same way as usual, one leg after another, pop 'em on, zip 'em up and stride about... wrong! Fashion is never that easy. And this season, the trouser is very fashion indeed; hence the use of the singular: 'trouser'. See? There follows a crash course in effective modern trouser-wearing. Currently, there are 10 hot trouser trends. They are: the Peg (high-waisted, slightly voluminous around the hip, tapered and cropped); the Harem Pant (considerably more voluminous, draped and folded around the waist, with a drop crotch that might inspire lesser beings to invoke MC Hammer, although you really shouldn't); the Jodphur; the Fancy Legging (in sequins, or in latex, possibly with a zip at the ankle, or a studded seam, or a stirrup attachment); the Leather Pant Redux; the Nouveau Bootcut (looks very much like the old boot cut, but we'll thank you not to point that out); the Trouser- Legging Hybrid; the Tuxedo Pant '08; the Very Wide Trouser (a constant since last season) and the Very Skinny Trouser, which is differentiated from the Trouser- Legging Hybrid by teeny tiny factors that are barely visible to the untrained eye, but which might encompass hip or back pockets, a slightly higher thread count, rivets, perhaps a belt loop; and will end bang on the ankle bone, a fraction below the finishing point for your Peg.

Got that? Good. Next: you must understand that each trouser concept requires a very different approach, and very different styling. For example: the Peg should only be worn with a shoeboot and a simple top (a classy vest, a blouse, a white shirt buttoned all the way up to the neck), this should be tucked into the high waist. The HaremPant works in a similar way, although you should ensure that your tucked-in top is v streamlined indeed, or risk the silhouette of a twisted-up balloon animal. The Fancy Legging can be worn with high-top Converse or an ornately carved high heel, and absolutely must be teamed with a top half with significant arse-covering properties: a very long cotton T-shirt (in a fine fabric, in the interest of achieving sexy draping and avoiding cotton bulk, American Apparel's men's deep V-neck in tri-blend cotton serves beautifully), and a boyfriendy blazer (Zara's excellent double-breasted charcoal-grey number, for example, £89). Both the Trouser-Legging Hybrid and the Jodphur, on the other hand, can be worn as a trouser - it isn't as essential to cover your bum to the same extent, the chunky nature of the fabric will make these pants feel less like - well, pants. It is essential, however, that you don't do the Jodphur and this season's riding boot. You are not Carla Bruni in Vanity Fair; (ooooh, unless you are, in which case, we love you, do you want to come to our house for wine and cakes?). Opt instead for pointy flats, Pierre Hardy for Gap (£35) perhaps. We told you all about the Leather Pant Redux last issue, but to recap: you should think Givenchy punky/grungey/goth luxe when styling up this number, and categorically not MILT (Mum In Leather Trousers). Polo necks and studded leather shoe boots rather than camisole tops and stilettos. See? The Tuxedo Pant '08 is marginally more cropped than the Tuxedo Pant '07, but otherwise, identical, and identically hot, and should be worn with a matching jacket. The Nouveau Bootcut is the trickiest cut du season, because if you're not terribly, terribly careful, you'll totally risk looking like you're wearing Bogstandard Bootcut, which went out of fashion three seasons ago. The only way to show that you're all over Nouveau Bootcut, is to wear it with a cape, because that's how they rolled at Jaeger. The Very Wide and Very Skinny Trousers are a doddle relatively; VWTs can be worn with a fine-knit polo neck and a wedge; VSTs with a Very Pointy Lace-Up, a flash of lairily coloured sock, and that totally necessary buttoned-up shirt, again.

1. The VST. Our favourite pair is Sportmax's crop cigarette pant, £175, matchesfashion.com

2. The harem. Freda at Matches, £265, www.matchesfashion.com

3. The peg. Acne, £120, www.acnejeans.com

4. The fancy legging in latex from Religion, £30, religionclothing.co.uk

5. The nouveau bootcut. Jaeger, £199, www.jaeger.com

6. The tux '08. Todd Lynn at Topshop, £79, 0845 121 4519

7. The jodphur. Jean-Pierre Braganza, £245, start-london.com

8. The VWT. Jaeger, £180, www.jaeger.com

9. The trouser legging. Sass & Bide, £99, www.brownsfashion.com

10. The leather pant redux at Topshop, from £95