' 'TWAS THE NIGHT' 'TIS AN ORDEAL TO WATCH.Byline: David Kronke TV Critic `` 'Twas the Night'' is one in that rapidly expanding series of holiday specials that has clearly been made by people who wouldn't recognize the holiday spirit if it came up and bit them on the backside (which, being the holiday spirit, it naturally wouldn't do, though in this case it might be wise to make an exception). Here's what this little family entertainment from the Disney Channel  Editing of this page by unregistered or newly registered users is currently disabled due to vandalism. offers up for your spiritual edification ed·i·fi·ca·tion n. Intellectual, moral, or spiritual improvement; enlightenment. Noun 1. edification - uplifting enlightenment sophistication : A grifter grift Slang n. 1. Money made dishonestly, as in a swindle. 2. A swindle or confidence game. v. grift·ed, grift·ing, grifts v.intr. , not likable enough to be the Grinch, who swipes Santa's sleigh sleigh: see sled. for the purposes of cleaning out the homes of the wealthy. Said con artist, pursued by a thug wanting to severely injure him over back debts - pass the eggnog while you're laughing it up, kids! - opts out of his lifestyle not because he learns it's wrong, but because he loses the acceptance of a peer. Is your heart warmed yet? Bryan Cranston - much, much funnier on ``Malcolm in the Middle'' - plays Nick Wrigley, who's in hot water over a recent scam, so he temporarily relocates to his upright brother's home. There, young Danny (Josh Zuckerman, who seems faintly embarrassed trying to play an aspiring cool guy) worships Nick, much to his parents' consternation. On Christmas Eve, Santa crash-lands on the Wrigley home and is rendered unconscious, spurring Nick and Danny to regurgitate re·gur·gi·tate v. 1. To rush or surge back. 2. To cause to pour back, especially to cast up partially digested food. re·gur the plot of ``The Santa Clause'' (and even last weekend's ``Call Me Claus''). Complications, needless to say, ensue, while director Nick Castle, who has dumped a number of theatrical duds on the planet (``Major Payne,'' ``Dennis the Menace Dennis the Menace latter-day Buster Brown, complete with dog. [Comics: Horn, 201] See : Mischievousness ,'' ``Mr. Wrong''), furiously shovels coal into the stockings of everyone watching. My 11-year-old was fairly appalled by much of the proceedings - computer knowledge figures into the story (Nick has given his computer a name: ``Lappy''), but even she pointed out a couple of glaring holes in the plot. And when Santa bests a punk in a street fight (don't ask) by tickling him, she exclaimed, not incorrectly, ``Oh, my God - that's just wrong.'' There's also a kid whose speech impediment is supposed to be cute; his big moment comes when he threatens to urinate urinate /uri·nate/ (u´ri-nat) to discharge urine. u·ri·nate v. To excrete urine. urinate to void urine. on merchandise in a computer store. Now obviously, holiday films shouldn't be sentimental tripe tripe the scalded and cleaned rumen and reticulum. The omasum is discarded because of the difficulty in cleaning between the leaves. anymore than they should cynical deconstructions of the genre. But `` 'Twas the Night'' is so thoroughly leaden in its efforts at humor and so utterly condescending to its audience that a fair punishment would be to force the responsible filmmakers to sit through the most horrifically earnest treacle treacle: see molasses. and the most manipulatively sentimental entertainments possible. First up: The fatuous Jim Belushi sop ``Mr. Destiny,'' followed by the lachrymose Jack Lemmon weepy ``Dad.'' `` 'TWAS THE NIGHT'' What: Yet more mortals take over for Santa - this time, a scam artist and his nephew. The stars: Bryan Cranston, Josh Zuckerman, Jefferson Mappin, Brenda Grate, Rhys Williams. Where: Disney Channel. When: 8 and 9:50 tonight; also Dec. 8, 9, 12, 19, 21, 24, 25. Our rating: One and one half stars CAPTION(S): photo Photo: Josh Zuckerman, left, Rhys Williams, Bryan Cranston and Brenda Grate star in the cynical `` 'Twas the Night.'' |
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