'THIEF' STEELS ITSELF WITH DARK HUMOR.

Byline: David Kronke TV Critic

When it opens, the new six-episode FX drama "Thief" could be mistaken for NBC's "Heist" or AMC's "Hustle."

Flippant crooks trade quips back and forth across "24"- style split screens as they go about their business. During the job, the leader even receives a comically inopportune cell-phone call from his wife - from a police station.

Don't settle into that tone too comfortably, because soon everything goes to hell for Nick (Andre Braugher) and his crew, which includes Malik Yoba as newly conflicted father Elmo; Yancey Arias as confident Gabo; and Clifton Collins Jr. as Jack, confused and caught between the worlds of spiritualism and sin.

For a group with such smooth skills, Nick and his bunch certainly are on the ropes. Their jobs somehow aren't bringing in enough money to sustain their lifestyles, there's divisive tension within their ranks - and the Chinese mob is after them, seeking deadly vengeance.

Nick lives in New Orleans, where his front business, like the rest of the city, is likewise struggling. (The series shot its pilot there before Hurricane Katrina, then included the tragedy into its story line when it returned to Louisiana to complete its first season.) Perhaps "struggling" is putting it mildly. In at least the three episodes made available for review, the series shows little compunction at killing off any number of seemingly major characters.

In fact, tonight's episode becomes so relentlessly grim that, when Nick tells his rebellious stepdaughter Tammi (Mae Whitman), "I know it's been a hard day, but we have to pull together as a family," it's hard to resist a bleak laugh. Not even an actor as gifted as Braugher can make that line seem credible.

"Thief" is plenty brooding, as you might imagine, but takes a little while for its overriding story line - involving stealing $40 million in covert operatives' money on its way to Columbia - to gather steam.

There's also a fair share of grandiose speechifying ("Forget those fat cats from Enron ...") and pro forma hipster discourse (two characters wax poetic on John Coltrane) that has become familiar in projects such as this, rather than establishing them as edgy.

Perhaps most disappointing is that despite some good, gritty performances, "Thief" doesn't really offer any indelible or empathetic characters, which can make enduring the bleak posturing something of a slog to get through. On the other hand, certainly no one can ever accuse this series of glamorizing a life of crime - or, for that matter, a life of anything.

David Kronke, [phone]

david.kronke(at)dailynews.com

THIEF - Two and one half stars

Our rating: What: Andre Braugher leads a hard-luck team of sophisticated crooks planning a major score.

Where: FX.

When: 10 tonight.

In a nutshell: Evocative in its grimness, albeit without the necessary empathetic characters to truly hook audiences.