'MALCOLM' NO DAY AT THE BEACH ... AND THAT'S GOOD.Byline: - David Kronke Last season, ``Malcolm in the Middle'' virtually single-handedly rescued its network, Fox, from the precipice of disaster, even though things never looked too good for Malcolm and his family, and particularly not for Dewey (Erik Per Sullivan Erik Per Sullivan (born on July 12, 1991) is an American actor, perhaps best known for his role as Dewey, the younger brother to middle child Malcolm, on the FOX series Malcolm in the Middle. ). In the season-ending cliffhanger cliff·hang·er n. 1. A melodramatic serial in which each episode ends in suspense. 2. A suspenseful situation occurring at the end of a chapter, scene, or episode. 3. , the cute, jug-eared goof wandered off on his own after his cranky baby sitter suffered a heart attack, while the rest of the family frolicked and feuded at the beach. Tonight's season opener clicks on all fronts - every subplot garners laughs, with the humor all over the map, from cartoonish to clever. Dewey is, naturally, on his quixotic quest to get back home, annoying a friendly frumpy frump n. 1. A girl or woman regarded as dull, plain, or unfashionable. 2. A person regarded as colorless and primly sedate. lady who helps him and befriending the dimestore thug who steals her car. Bikers, rockers and all manner of reprobates aid Dewey in short order. Dewey's saga, however, has its fire stolen by the rest of the family's outrageous trials. A semi jackknifes on the freeway, backing traffic up for miles and inspiring everyone to react amusingly: Dad (Bryan Cranston) reflects, in a pathetically maudlin maud·lin adj. Effusively or tearfully sentimental: "displayed an almost maudlin concern for the welfare of animals" Aldous Huxley. See Synonyms at sentimental. fashion, on his own mortality. Mom (Jane Kaczmarek) explodes in paroxysms of rage at the police and road crew employees who aren't mopping the mess up quickly enough for her tastes. Reese (Justin Berfield) plots against a sadistic sa·dism n. 1. The deriving of sexual gratification or the tendency to derive sexual gratification from inflicting pain or emotional abuse on others. 2. The deriving of pleasure, or the tendency to derive pleasure, from cruelty. ice-cream truck driver who hilariously refuses to sell his wares to the baking populace, while Malcolm finds a girl he could fall for - she even lies to cops - who, alas, has a secret imperiling our hero's happily-ever-after (even Malcolm is dubious it exists). Meanwhile, at military camp, Francis (Christopher Kennedy Masterson) has bet the other charges that he can chomp (jargon) chomp - To fail. down 100 marshmallow marshmallow /marsh·mal·low/ (mahrsh´mel?o) (-mal?o) a perennial Eurasian herb, Althaea officinalis, ``quacks'' (think ``peeps'') without too many ill effects, which makes for some inspired gross-out humor. Future episodes likewise promise a wide expanse of humor both slapstick and subtler, though not a great deal subtler. When Lois feels taken for granted Adj. 1. taken for granted - evident without proof or argument; "an axiomatic truth"; "we hold these truths to be self-evident" axiomatic, self-evident obvious - easily perceived by the senses or grasped by the mind; "obvious errors" when the family shrugs off her birthday, only a fistfight battle with clowns at the local batting cage will convince her that the men in her life really do care for her. And a night out at a nice restaurant with a civilized family starts out looking like an uncharacteristic, slice-of-life episode until the requisite mayhem ensues - and a shocked and chagrined Malcolm realizes, ``Omigod! We're contagious!'' As is the show. ``MALCOLM IN THE MIDDLE'' What: Second-season premiere of the popular dysfunctional-family sitcom. The stars: Frankie Muniz, Jane Kaczmarek, Bryan Cranston. Where: Fox (Channel 11). When: 8:30 tonight. Our rating: Three stars The truth is out there ... but who cares anymore? At this point, former darling of the Zeitgeist ``The X-Files'' has lost much of its potency (it started slipping about the time the movie came along and explained virtually nothing). Creator/executive producer Chris Carter says he wouldn't still be doing the show if he didn't have good stories to tell, but then, what's he going to say? He may have good stories to tell, but judging from the first couple of episodes from the series' eighth season, they're the good stories he was telling in seasons two, four and five. Last season concluded with Mulder (David Duchovny) being abducted abducted Distal angulation of an extremity away from the midline of the body in a transverse plane and away from a sagittal plane passing through the proximal aspect of the foot or part, or away from some other specified reference point by a UFO UFO: see unidentified flying objects. (United Functions and Objects) A programming language developed by John Sargeant at Manchester University, U.K. (as Scully was, back in the first season's cliffhanger) and Scully (Gillian Anderson) discovering she was pregnant. Duchovny wanted out this year in the worst way possible, of course, but agreed to appear in half the episodes for a major pay raise (Anderson, to her dismay, was contractually constrained to do this season). Tonight's episode is typical ``X-Files'' obfuscation ob·fus·cate tr.v. ob·fus·cat·ed, ob·fus·cat·ing, ob·fus·cates 1. To make so confused or opaque as to be difficult to perceive or understand: "A great effort was made . . . , some narrative wheel-spinning with nothing really revealed or advanced. It does, however, introduce Robert Patrick as Federal Agent John Doggett - another name based on Carter's favorite Dodgers play-by-play men. (If he gets around to naming someone after Ross Porter, the show should be shut down; actually, the X-Files should probably already be closed by now.) Doggett is assigned by the usual powerful yet sinister forces to determine what happened to Mulder, as long as what happened didn't involve aliens or UFOs or special effects. Scully - who by now has to buy into Mulder's theories through process of elimination The process of elimination is a basic logical tool to solve real world problems. By subsequently removing options that may be deemed impossible, illogical, or can be easily ruled out due to some sort of explicit understanding relative to the entire set of options, the pool of - and Skinner (Mitch Pileggi), who saw Mulder's abduction Abduction Balfour, David expecting inheritance, kidnapped by uncle. [Br. Lit.: Kidnapped] Bertram, Henry kidnapped at age five; taken from Scotland. [Br. Lit. , don't trust Doggett, naturally, though it appears they should, and he doesn't trust their thoughts on Mulder's whereabouts. Next week, in a more eventful episode, Doggett gets an eyeful eye·ful n. 1. A complete view. 2. One that is pleasing to the sight, especially an attractive person. 3. of paranormal paranormal, adj 1. outside the realm of normal experience or scientific explanation. n 2. collective term for anomalous phenomena. mayhem as the shape-shifting bounty hunter returns yet again, while everyone's chasing after a kid who appeared in a season five episode. Seems the aliens are trying to eliminate all evidence that they exist, as if anyone's done anything that substantial with all the evidence amassed to date. (Carter's mythology episodes, once the show's strength, have dragged on to the point of irrelevance, since it's long been obvious he has no master plan.) Anderson should demand a moratorium on those dumb, pretentious monologues she's routinely forced to drone (next week's: ``We live in a darkness of our own making'' with ``beings traveling through time and space, imaginable to us only through flights of fancy''). Duchovny has very little to do for his huge paydays, just standing around moody and mute and, in some kinky dreams courtesy of Scully, screaming a couple of times as he's poked and prodded by alien doodads. Oh, and Mulder has another secret. Next week, Skinner declares, ``This has gone too far.'' Scully replies, ``It hasn't gone far enough.'' They're both right. ``THE X-FILES'' What: Eighth-season premiere of the paranormal drama. The stars: Gillian Anderson, Robert Patrick, Mitch Pileggi, David Duchovny. Where: Fox (Channel 11). When: 9 tonight. Our rating: Two and one half stars CAPTION(S): 2 photos Photo: (1) The cast of ``Malcolm in the Middle'' includes, clockwise from top left, Bryan Cranston, Jane Kaczmarek, Justin Berfield, Frankie Muniz, Erike Per Sullivan and Christopher Kennedy Masterson. (2) Agent John Doggett (Robert Patrick) joins Agent Dana Scully (Gillian Anderson) in the eighth season of ``The X-Files.'' |
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